And if I had room for a longer heading I would have added “And CJ has balls, takes the Maccas”.
15 players, 10 birdies and 9 awards this week.
Most innovative course management strategy: Last week Raj was scheduled in Group 1, turned up on time, hit his first drive into Charlie’s Bush and played miserably all day thereafter.
This week Raj was scheduled in Group 1, so obviously a different strategy was required – sleep in (allegedly), miss tee time, create chaos with the groups, then wander in late, slot into the last group and have a nice quiet casual walk collecting 40 stableford points and first place points.
Best laugh of the week: Peps on the 12th. Peps who had 38 points for second, which included the world’s longest ever run on a 3 wood (second shot into the 6th which bounced about 100 metres out and ran all the way onto the green) could not stop giggling on the 12th watching Porks (5 putts and counting) and Targe – who was in good form after a trip to Numurkah – manage the hole placement there. Any putt from above the hole broke about 90 degrees left and was tricky. Ditto on the 13th where Michael and Nalin missed from about 18 inches.
We could whinge but we won’t award: Michael and Nalin interrupted their normal pre-game warm up to go in Group 1 after the Raj no show, joining Steve. They were told with confidence by CJ (Group 3) that the “Preferred lies” board wasn’t out so no preferred lies. Steve, playing with a very crook back, had some stinking lies over first five holes. Apparently just as Group 3 was about to hit off, the pro-shop remembered to put out the “Preferred lies” board. This got communicated to groups who had missed the memo eventually (the 6th hole in the case of Group 1). Between his dodgy back and lies, Steve G did well to score 34 points. As did Nalin, who played much better than his 34 points suggests and – watch this space – you heard it here first – he will do some serious winning before the year is out.
Best shot of the day: Normally Peps 3 wood on the 6th would have won. Or Porks chip-in on the 8th with a skinny chip that was heading into the Yarra before it somehow hit the pin and dropped in. But today of course was all about the CJ 8 iron into the 9th. How far can CJ hit an 8 iron? Well depending on which version you heard of his eagle on the 9th, he can hit his 8 iron a bit further than Rory McIlroy. But whatever the actual distance, Brendon declared “that’s going to be close” when CJ hit it and then they discovered it was more than close, somehow wedged against the pin from the back. How did it get there? Anyway, it was the Eagles Nest prize for CJ which under new club rules can be taken in balls (7) or cash. CJ took the cash saying he would treat the grandkids to Maccas.
Quote of the week: Now be it the 9th today or other times, CJ has been known to occasionally wax lyrical about what he has done or is about to do with a golf shot. Lining up a putt on the 14th, he was giving some detailed descriptions of the likely trajectory his ball would take after his gifted hands guided the putter to connect with the ball. One of his playing partners was moved to offer the following advice “Just hit the bloody thing”. No prizes for guessing who. Hint: Check “Play Your Age” in the Honour Boards section of the website.
Loudest Tantrum: Michael after a second shot duff into the 16th who allegedly scared one of our members going in the other direction playing the 14th from the 16th fairway. The Environment Protection Authority (EPA) were on site later with their noise pollution measuring equipment and have issued Michael with a “get your act together notice”. Michael’s defence was that he cried quietly rather than screamed after 3 putting the 17th from 15 feet.
David Attenborough Award: Peps and the crow that took his smokes out of his bag and had a peck but couldn’t get the lighter going. Porks losing a bag of snakes, with the same crow the chief suspect. Porks one bite into a pie on the 10th got swooped by a magpie who whacked him on the head and took the pie out in the process. One dead pie splattered over the path.
Duddest whole of group effort: None of 15 players could hit the 18th green. Tee was forward, pin on lower tier. Jackpot NTP there. Raj won the NTP ball on the 4th and Peps snuck in under the 5 metre limit (4.88) for the money on the 15th.
Footy finals supporters psychology award: Good to see Bobby Mc up and about. Bloody Collingwood supporters, they seem to be everywhere again this September. Does the club include anybody who barracks for the Lions, Geelong or Hawthorn. Please may one of those three beat Collingwood this week or next by a point or so with a kick after the siren.
Results for Saturday, 13 Sep 2025
1st Rajesh Mahto (40) 2nd Andrew Petricola (38) 3rd Craig Cameron (34) 3rd Steven Gervasoni (34) 3rd Chris Priems (34) 3rd Nalin Samaranayake (34) 4th Targe Mifsud (32) 4th Ryan Porker (32) 5th Michael Gourlay (31) 5th Bob McDonald (31) 5th Andrew Vogan (31)
Seniors Results: 1st Craig Cameron (34) 1st Steven Gervasoni (34) 1st Chris Priems (34) 2nd Targe Mifsud (32) 3rd Michael Gourlay (31) 3rd Bob McDonald (31) 3rd Andrew Vogan (31)
Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 15th Andrew Petricola BallPin No 1 – 4th Rajesh Mahto BallPin No 2 – 18th Jackpot
Eagle’s Nest Results: Eagle – 9th Chris Priems