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Wake up, Captain Curlyhead on 02 March 2024.

Porks got balls
I should sleep in more often!

Eleven members made it to the eighteenth today after a number of uncertainties had been sorted out. Ken got told he was doing other things, Raj made a late bid to get his name registered, Porks slept through the alarm, Craig wasn’t sure that he was up for eighteen, and Stan had to dash off to work on his other house. The conditions were pretty mild but overcast, and it did make a bit of a shower at the half-way mark. Hardly worth bothering reaching for the umbrella, although a few did. The course is definitely drying out, and the trees are shedding leaves at a furious rate, which can make spotting a ball an interesting exercise. A bit of a breeze sprang up from time to time, but nothing that a low penetrating shot couldn’t counteract. That is, if anybody can pull such a thing off. Despite the apparently benign conditions, we could only manage two birdies for the day.

There was a desperate ‘Put me in the last group’ text from Porks as the rest of the field milled around the registration desk. It is unclear whether any traffic rules were breached on the way, but the lad was able to make it to the tee before the first group had even hit off. The rush to get there obviously had little effect on his nerves or his concentration, as he rattled off six pars in the first seven holes, and finished the front nine just two strokes over the card. Another five pars and a birdie on the back produced a three over for that nine, and that included a power shank (he is a leftie) into Birrarung from the 17th tee to make the only real blemish on the card. The net sixty-six was more than enough to take the day, and to join the ranks of the select few who have won a Medal this year (as Gordo was wont to point out!).

Craig presented to the starter for the first time in quite a while due to some health problems. He had a little bit of a whinge about having to play off his old handicap after a break of nine months. He did admit to having been to the driving range during the week. The early gossip on the course was the ‘Old Reliable’ was back, although there were a few doubles sprinkled through the card. There were also a good sprinkling of pars, including one on the 6th. The third shot hit a tree that saved it from a worse fate, while the fourth carried through the green. It just required a hole-out from off the green to seal the deal. Charlie did overcome his nemesis of the first tee, and managed to make it past the shrubbery only to find the trees, but not his ball. Undaunted, he made par on the second, which is no mean feat from a tee placed about as far back as it was possible to be placed. The need for ‘cut lunches’ was mentioned in passing. At the end of it all, Charlie was pretty pleased with his day’s work when he finished with a net score of 69, and he got to share second place with Craig.

Bob missed
Will you just look at that!

Raj and Targe played in the same group, but there was no suggestion that there had been any collusion leading to the fact that they both finished on net 72 to take out 3rd place for the day. Raj put together a bit of a mixed bag of scores, with just enough outliers to deny him a much better placing. Targe was similarly just a bit too erratic to have scored better, but he did manage a birdie on the 16th, which surely must have involved some sort of story, but it was kept well under wraps. As SOS wrote down the results, he cheered every announcement of a tied score, as his chances of scoring a point increased. In the end, he scored two points for 4th place with a score of 73, from a round that he described as being awful. Not as awful as some, however. Bob had his moments again today. Possibly, it was because he turned up without his glasses, just one of a list of things that made him wonder at the wisdom of even turning up. And, it was not a meteorite that caused the crater behind his tee and moved the ball a few centimetres. Despite this little set-back, Bob still managed to produce a net 77, and he was quite happy to accept the point on offer for fifth place.

The first BallPin was on the 12th today, and Daniel, playing his first competition round today, put in a good bid, only to be ousted by Porks, who managed to get it closer in. Ryan tried to make a real day of it when he added his name to the Jackpot ProPin on the 15th, although he was barely inside the required limit. However, he hadn’t counted on Old Reliable, who made a cracking shot to just 2.26m and collected the money despite protests that he hadn’t contributed for so long. Dan also had hopes of doubling up when he made the green on the 18th. This time he was successful, and held out to collect a ball on his first outing with us.

Although he has flown the coop, the Birthday Birdie wants to wish ChrisJ all the best for the event in the coming week, as well as for his new adventure up north.

Dan is a mate of Charlie, but did he really have to try to imitate Charlie on the first tee? Fortunately, the ball had enough altitude to escape the shrubbery and carry on down the hill. There is a warning out to keep all sharp cutting implements away from Gordo after the highlight of his round was a par on the 8th that resulted from three ‘lousy’ shots and a ‘putt’ from off the green. While we are on the 8th, Porks had his ball nicely positioned on the green. SOS chipped onto the green, his ball rolled along and struck Porks’ ball. Then it was Bob’s turn. His chip landed nicely, rolled on and also struck Porks’ ball. The question was, where exactly was the original location of the ball? Harry had a bit of tree trouble on the 11th and went close to taking his own head off when his second, after a tree had delivered it by the 10th green, found another tree and the ball whistled back over his head to finish behind him. And we won’t mention roosters and feather dusters!

Prez is sporting some new facial adornment as he endeavours to cultivate a more mature look as he prepares to enter the Senior ranks next season. The only report about Bob’s buggy this week was the fact that he lost the jockey wheel on the first, but it was found while searching for his ball, so neither was lost. Dan found himself in the drain beside the path up from the 13th green and opted to play it as it lay. Not the most successful outcome as the ball ran further down the path and finished in the drain once more. This time he took relief and the shot was slightly more successful, but barely past the chain barrier beside the path. After finishing at the bottom of the slope, he ‘slammed’ the putt home for a triple. But, if it had missed…??

Don’t forget, Matchplay is under way. Please talk to one another and play your matches, Round 1 or Round 2. Two weeks to the AGM, so keep those Committee nominations rolling in. Club Captain and Vice-President are needed, but all positions are open for contest. A bit of new blood never did any harm.

Results for Saturday, 02 Mar 2024
1st Ryan Porker (66) 2nd Craig Cameron (69) 2nd Charles Gibbs (69) 3rd Rajesh Mahto (72) 3rd Targe Mifsud (72) 4th Stephen O’Sullivan (73) 5th Bob McDonald (77)

Seniors Results: 1st Craig Cameron (69) 2nd Targe Mifsud (72) 3rd Bob McDonald (77)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 15th Craig Cameron BallPin No 1 – 12th Ryan Porker BallPin No 2 – 18th Dan Marie