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Lightning strikes twice on 04 March 2023.

The royal purple
My name is Ozymandias…..

It was another lovely day at the office! The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and the whole world was happy – except for us and the ladies behind after a late start occasioned by several groups teeing off before us. And there is still another month of daylight saving to go. However, twenty-one members and two guests (John Dimopoulos and Tony Fazzolari) put all that behind them and set out to tackle the worst that Ivanhoe could throw at us. Actually, the course itself was pretty benign, it was the casual players picking up or playing balls that should have been left for somebody else that caused some problems. There were a few complaints about the pace of the greens being hard to gauge, but isn’t that always the case when you leave it too short or hit it too long! Strange that there are never any complaints when the ball goes in! The temperature did get up a bit before the round finished, and just a gentle reminder that a good supply of water and regular intakes helps immeasurably in maintaining concentration as the day progresses. We would hate to have anyone suffering from dehydration and/or heat stroke and requiring medical assistance.

There was a certain amount of email chat during the week that included the following line – “On your new handicap, the same score next week will be about net 62, so good luck repeating that effort!”. This was obviously akin to a red rag for a bull. Like a man on a mission to get the round finished and to get himself to Geelong in a hurry, Gordo absolutely blitzed the course again and rocked up with a 73 off the stick and a net of 61 to take out the March Monthly Medal. In the process, his handicap has taken another whacking. Gordo was also taking on Rob in their first round match, and so Rob was trying his hand at ‘trash-talking’ to try to gain some sort of advantage. Unfortunately, this had the opposite effect and Gordo finished off the match at the 15th by chipping in for a birdie from about 15m out to take the match 4 and 3, and just about broke Rob’s heart in the process.

Matt tried to make it easy for the handicapper today by attempting to fill his card with the one number, to whit, 4. He started off with five in a row, and finished off with six in a row, and a few more made a total of fourteen altogether. His front nine ended up only two over par, and the whole round just six over, leaving him with a net score of 65 for his award of second place. This gave him an early advantage over Bill in their match, and he was never headed, although Bill did make a bit of a comeback to make the score dormie 2 after the sixteenth. A pair of pars on the 17th gave the match to Matt 2 and 1 which he saw as revenge for his defeat last year at the hands of the same opponent. The luck of the draw, eh!

Things are a bit quiet on the fruit front at the moment, with the mango season in its final days. It’s not clear whether Ken has been able to use this respite to work on his game, but he was obviously more relaxed today and was able to snare third place with just a little bit of a break of the old handicap. BIll was standing around this morning wondering which group he was in, when he was informed by CJ that he was in the next group and playing Matt in their match. Despite the thing that they say is bliss, the Beast was able to put together a reasonable round to get fourth place with his net score of 67.

Stan was examining his driver on the first tee and commenting that, although it was adjustable, it had never been adjusted, and he had no idea how they were supposed to work. This might very well be a good thing, because, despite a couple of ‘fat ladies’ he put together a handicap equalling round to grab a piece of fifth place. He was joined by Brendon who really only blotted his copy-book on one hole on the front, and was only 2 over the card on the back to finish right on handicap as well. It’s a tough school when you have to play to your handicap to score a point!

The first BallPin today was on the 12th, and Rob sealed the deal early on with a shot to a metre or so from the pin. The BallPin on the 18th fell to Josh, who lined up for his first competition today after qualifying for his handicap. This might compensate slightly for the 3rd hole, where his drive trickled about 3 metres to finish well short of the reds. This was followed by an air-swing and an OOB, only to be told by Dad that he had to finish the hole as it was a stroke event. To rub salt into the wounds, Matt wanted Josh to repay him a ball for the one he lost, and this after Josh had paid Matt’s comp fee. Nothing like tough love! Anyway, the ProPin was a Jackpot, and, once again, nobody was able to get it close enough to the pin, so there will be a Double Jackpot up for grabs next week.

There were two more matches fought out today. Craig and SteveG looked as if they were going to be pretty evenly matched through the first nine as the lead ebbed and flowed. By the 12th, things were starting to look a bit dire for Old Reliable, until a couple of wins brought the match to dormie 3 after the 15th. The need to keep winning proved to be a road too far, and a pair of pars on the 17th handed the match to Steve 3 and 1. Harry and Jonathan squared the first four holes. Then Jonathan put on a burst and won the next five holes. When H commented on the need to review Jon’s handicap, Stan said – there’s always the back nine! Pars on the 10th and 11th raised the spirits, and the tee shot on the 12th was not quite as close as Rob’s. Bobbie’s was a little further out, and he sneaked his in for a birdie. Pointing out to his ball that this was the way to do it, H also slotted his to bring the score back to a much more palatable 2 down. These two birdies, by the way, brought the total for the day to 10. Three halves threatened the dreaded dormie match, but a fortuitous ‘fade-out’ by Jon handed Harry the match on the last hole, 1 up.

Bob had his usual share of moments during the round. Putts that just missed and sat on the edge of the cup, putts that rattled in from off the green, fairway shot that hit a branch and whistled back about thirty meters behind where he stood. The save of the day had to have been on the 7th where he was ‘saved by the gong’ figuratively speaking. His drive speared off left, heading for who knows where, and likely not to get past the reds, save for the tombstone and a piece of metal leaning against it that deflected the ball with a resounding clang and allowed it to scamper past the relevant markers. Brendon sprayed his drive on the second a bit, and a bit of a search ensued. ChrisJ, on being told that Brendon’s ball was marked with BM, declared that the one that he had found wasn’t it because it was marked WB. Maybe the ball was upside down or Chris is a bit cock-eyed already in preparation for his birthday in a few days time. Keep your eye out for the Birthday Birdie.

The barbeque after the round was much appreciated by all, as evidenced by the fact that there was not a lot left for taking home for the ‘dog’. It’s a fair bet there are cold snags and burgers on the table at somebody’s house tonight! For those that had to dash off, maybe next time you will be able to stay for a bite to eat and a bit of frivolity.

Results for Saturday, 04 Mar 2023
1st Gordon Hill (61) 2nd Matt Hunt (65) 3rd Ken Watson (66) 4th Bill Eastoe (67) 5th Stan Blackshaw (68) 5th Brendon Mitchell (68)

Seniors Results: 1st Gordon Hill (61) 2nd Ken Watson (66) 3rd Bill Eastoe (67)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 15th Jackpot BallPin No 1 – 12th Robert Priems BallPin No 2 – 18th Josh Hunt