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Someone jumped the gun on 20 March 2021

Pepsi and Noodles
Which one will come out on top?

The question everybody wants answered is whether SOS will out-do his pink flamingos or will he just wear it again next week. Everybody should know by this, it’s Club shirts for Medals and Majors but garish Hawaiian shirts for the second week of the Stuart Clarke Memorial. Not the first! Ben was able to get to Anaconda and buy himself a tent that actually looked remarkably like a Club shirt. A bit of rain last weekend might have taken just a little of the run off the course, but there are still quite a few bony patches out there if you know where to find them. The greens have had a bit of a ‘top-dressing’ during the week and, apparently, the sand used was not quite up to scratch and the remnants of bark and charcoal caused problems for some people while others were entirely oblivious to the problem. But maybe that was because their golf was so crap that it didn’t matter. The weather was nice and warm and so there was a good showing of bare arms, but there are still some legs yet to see the light of day. All in all, there were 38 arms and 38 legs out on the course today including qualifying members Chris and Anthony together with Stuart’s dad Rodger who would not miss this event for quids.

Noodles was a little less than happy on the 9th when he missed a tiddler for a point which left him with just 18 points for the front nine. He stepped onto the 10th and declared that he planned to score 22 on the back, and he went ahead and did just that with a par equalling nine that included just the one bogie. Perhaps as compensation for the 9th, some of his putts were classed (by Noodles) as lucky. Pepsi also had a pointless hole for his 18 on the front nine, but, as far as is known, he did not declare his intentions about the back at the tenth tee. His 22 points required a score that was one under the card and that could have been better if not for a ‘stupid’ – Pepsi’s words – missed opportunity on the 17th that only found him a single point. To say nothing of the double on the 6th.

Whitey has come back from his summer of cricket, and he set out to prove that swiping at a moving big red ball had done nothing to his ability to swipe at a stationary little white ball. As a result, he will be right up there in the back group doing his darnedest to keep the b*ds honest and also to rain on their parade to take out the trophy. Trevor continues to benefit from his recent lesson and has been hitting them well. What he and his marker need to do now is to take lessons in how to deal with his veterans handicap. Trev is now right in the mix and, if he can keep up with the good form there is a chance that he could just snag the big one.

Old Reliable hit them right up the hi-diddle-diddle again today and did not embarrass himself by playing to his handicap and staying within striking distance of the leaders. Of course, he does not have the field to himself. Michael seems to be holding himself together with little signs of the niggling injuries that have kept him away over the last little while. In the meantime, Adam will also be there keeping a close eye on the proceedings as he, too, prepares to make a claim for the honours.

To round out what is probably the largest batch of real contenders that we have had for a Major in a long time, we have Anaconda Ben, Inspector Gadget Matt and SpongeBob Squarepants all tied up with their score today of 35 points. Ben claimed that his game was just too consistent to have generated stories worth printing. Just about every putt that Bob missed should have gone in but that is so common-place that it is not worth reporting. And Matt, well, he was just Matt.

The first BallPin was on the 7th again after the failure to perform last week. It was a close run thing again this week with Damo the only one to get his name on the card. He kept up the good form on the short holes to take out the ProPin on the 12th with a shot to 1.96m. He did manage to sink it for the birdie and that helped in a small way to get us to a tally of 19 for the day. The final BallPin on the 18th ended up being a ‘fait accompli’ after Anthony, playing in the first group so that he could get away to his daughter’s netball, whacked it in close to hold out all comers. Keith did get closer, but the only problem was, it was his second shot.

ChrisJ put in his third card today, and just to prove that he was not ‘working’ the system it was a personal best 83 off the stick. The Handicapper is glad that he did not go with Chris’s old GA handicap from his days at Roxby Downs. Anthony also put in a low 80’s card for his second and the consensus seems to be that he will be a force to be reckoned with when he settles in.

Despite being right up there with the contenders, Whitey did own up to a draughtie on the second. Anybody else must have kept quiet about it. Michael reckons Ken was pretty stiff on the front nine with any number of putts left teetering on the brink of the hole and not falling in. A similar fate befell Blighty who, to quote, ‘concentrated too much on getting the line right’ and left the ball hanging tantalisingly on the edge of the cup. Michael, to the approbation of Anthony, fairly smashed one down the 16th and elicited the comment, ‘that’s your best for the day’. This was closely followed by Anthony smashing his at least 25m further down the fairway than Michael. Damo was claiming a first, for him, today. He actually shanked chips.

There was one match played today with Pepsi taking on the Kiwi. The Kiwi had the better of it while Pepsi ‘struggled’ with the front nine. The tide turned fairly quickly as they moved onto the back and, although Brendon was able to prolong the agony by squaring a number of holes in a row, he slipped on the fifteenth and handed the match to Pepsi 4 and 3. Still a fair swag of matches to be played in the first round with two Saturdays to go before the deadline. Now, we know that there were a number of ‘ring-ins’ to fill the draw and there may have been many reasons for people not registering to play. But, we have to stick to the schedule, so, it is probably preferable, if you are one of the ‘ring-ins’ (or even if you are not one of those) and cannot comply with the deadline, for whatever reason, that you withdraw gracefully and concede the walkover.

Don’t forget. Your best loud Hawaiian shirt to honour Stuart next week. And hang around for the barbeque. It’s only snags and burgers and trimmings, but it’s always good fun to hang out and get to know one another away from the rough and tumble out on the course.

CONDOLENCES: It is with great sadness that the Club extends our condolences to Stan Blackshaw and his family on the sad passing of Stan’s wife over night. Chin up old matey, and we look forward to when you can get back to join us at the ‘Hoe.

Results for Saturday, 20 March 2021
Leaderboard Round 1: 1st Stephen Butterfield(40) 1st Andrew Petricola(40) 2nd Rodney White(39) 3rd Trevor Jackson(37) 4th Craig Cameron(36) 4th Michael Gourlay(36) 4th Adam King(36) 5th Ben Akdag(35) 5th Matt Hunt(35) 5th Bob McDonald(35)

Seniors Leaderboard: 1st Rodney White (39) 2nd Trevor Jackson (37) 3rd Craig Cameron (36) 3rd Michael Gourlay (36)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 12th Damien Lee BallPin No 1 – 7th Damien Lee BallPin No 2 – 18th Anthony Browne