It was a lucky thing that the potential rain event actually did hold off until the middle of the day. The course management (mis)managed to run out of the fairly solid scorecards that have been handed out for the last few years, and have had to resort to using photocopies instead. Besides offering nothing firm to write on, and being easily subject to puncturing in the process, they would very likely have dissolved had there been even a hint of moisture in the air. Despite this little annoyance, eleven members and Ryan’s mate, Tim, set out to do battle for the October Monthly Medal. After a hiatus of some eleven months, Tim has finally submitted his third card, and will be rearing to get stuck into the competition now that he has a Club handicap to play with. Welcome to the Club, Tim, your name will be added to the registration system so that you can join us next week in our efforts to get enough local players for a formal competition while the rest of the gang go swanning off to do battle with the delights of Cobram, both on and off the course. The course was in pretty good nick, although the gum nuts on some of the greens made for some interesting putts, and some interesting discussion as to whether it would be legal to carry a battery operated blower for the purposes of clearing a path for a putt. The sand coating from last week was somewhat settled in, but there was still enough around to pick up on a damp ball.

The decision about the winner of the Medal was a somewhat fraught affair. On the cards presented, there was a tie for top spot, and the necessary calculations were made to determine the winner by count-back. This seemed to indicate that CJ had beaten Harry by half a stroke on the back nine net basis. And this is where one Senior moment came to light. Harry teed off on the 10th, and cracked a beauty straight down the centre of the fairway. It was only when Stan lined up to follow suit, that it was realised that H had inadvertently teed off from the blue markers. The resultant two stroke penalty appeared to have robbed him of the medal. But, then, there was another Senior moment! CJ had handed in his inside card to the Club and vice versa, meaning that his actual score was 72 and not 70, so Harry did eventually win the Medal. Just goes to show, it pays to concentrate on what you are doing, both on and off the course.

Craig has been described as the metronome of the Club. Tick, tock, tick, tock, down the centre again. Of course, that wasn’t much help when it came to negotiating the gum nuts on the greens, with one example being described as ‘big as a walnut’, and really should have been spotted and cleared from the path. A pretty handy back nine, just four over the card, allowed him to finish just a stroke behind Harry on net 71. CJ is hoping that the ProShop take pity on him and adjust the handicap on the card he submitted to them. In point of fact, they don’t have to, as the rules state that playing to a lower handicap, the score recorded stands, whereas playing to a higher handicap results in disqualification. The two stroke difference, that we kind-hearted types correct for rather than disqualify, means that he gets to fill third place with a net of 72 strokes.

Stan mostly had his driver working well today, and a few times expressed surprise that he managed to avoid some of his ‘usual’ travels to one side of the fairway or another. His shorter game did present a few moments during the round. A serious shank?, on the 8th, headed for the OOB fence at a fair rate of knots. Possibly, fortunately, it hit one of the fence posts absolutely dead centre and came straight back towards him for most of the distance. But, despite the short game glitches, a net score of 73 was enough to get fourth place, and the fourth Senior in a row. Could the oldies clean sweep the points? The answer to that question is no! Brendon put his drive on the first out onto the 10th, and managed to thread his way through the trees to leave the ball just through the green about pin high (from the normal approach). The putt never looked like missing, and the ‘birdie first’ omen was invoked. He managed to need a provisional to complete the third, and took a penalty on the sixth, which ended up leaving the front nine card looking a little sorry. The back nine was a little better, and he was able to scratch together a net score of 74 to take the final point on offer.

The ProPin today was set on the 4th, which, with the white set a fair way back, proved to be too much for the field, and there will be a Jackpot on offer next week (provided that we get enough players for a comp). The first BallPin was on the 12th, and Brendon had hopes of getting something more than a point for the day. However, Porks came along and went a bit better and added another ball to the long list that was owing to him from previous weeks. On the 18th, Brendon managed to make it onto the bottom deck, and, fairly reluctantly, measured the distance for the inside ProPin, which came out to something like 15.94m. Once again, he was foiled in his quest for loot when CJ got inside him, even if it was still some 12.5m from the hole. Needless to say, neither of these efforts resulted in a birdie, but we did manage to rack up a total of six for the day.

When Porks was asked about his game today, he indicated that he was suffering from a hangover. Not the alcoholic kind, but a hangover from his handicap busting performance last week. Bob had a couple of moments today. He managed to capsize his buggy, again, and bumped into others. While standing by the green on the 14th, he felt a bump on his leg, looked down, saw a ball and thought he had dropped his, so he picked it up. Only problem was, the ball was actually incoming from JQ. And, while on the subject of JQ, he might have made an error of club selection on the 18th and finished well short of the green, hard up against the base of a tree, which was a bit surprising given the slope of the ground in the vicinity. As an aside, for some time in the ‘clubhouse’, until the last group came in, and the mistake by CJ with card submission was detected, it looked as if a net score of 82 (multiple cards) could have scored a point. No names, no pack-drill.

A couple of birthdays didn’t get a mention last week. Michael actually had one last Saturday, and Adam celebrated one during the week. So, a little belatedly, the Birthday Birdie says, hope you had a good one, and many more of the same.

Results for Saturday, 05 Oct 2024
1st Harry Boughen (70) 2nd Craig Cameron (71) 3rd Chris Priems (72) 4th Stan Blackshaw (73) 5th Brendon Mitchell (74)

Seniors Results: 1st Harry Boughen (70) 2nd Craig Cameron (71) 3rd Chris Priems (72)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 4th Jackpot BallPin No 1 – 12th Ryan Porker BallPin No 2 – 18th Chris Priems

The bloke some people call Ryan has a touch of the Joey Danihers, a quietly spoken family man, a lefty, a bit mercurial, you are never quite sure what you are going to get, but capable of the big shots under pressure.

And so on the big stage at Royal Ivanhoe this week, playing Grand Par in front of a crowd that was just 100,001 less than the 100,013 at the MCG, Porks delivered.

A somewhat shaky start was offset by a great shot into the 4th for both a birdie and a win of the Nearest the Pin on offer there.

Hitting half time at minus 1 was nothing special, but Porks then rattled off three pluses on 10, 12 (another birdie) and 14, adding another on the 16th for a one under 32 off the stick on the back nine (71 off the stick for the round) and a +3 total.

Along the way he also won the Pro-pin money on the 15th with another great shot to 4.33 metres. In his victory parade from there Porks was generous enough to let somebody else win the Nearest the pin on the 18th with Johnny Q taking that one after a great shot to the top tier that got inside the mark Dan had set earlier.

After some post-round score checking amongst the mathematically challenged field, there were quite a few adjustments to the results announced on the day. Both Steve and Dan gained an extra stroke and John Quinlan’s GA card went the other way by three strokes, although his club card was correct.

One score that didn’t change was Michael’s whose card was marked with precision by ex-school teacher Stan. This task was made easy by a nice neat eight gashes in a row from holes 3 through 10 and a minus 10 total for Michael. This made him this week’s clear NAGA winner and together with Peps (minus 7) the only player not to score a championship or seniors point.

Dan continued his good form and his adjusted score of +1 was good enough for second on his own. If not for a blip on the 17th, he might have joined Porks at the top of the leaderboard.

CJ was on fire early and hit the half time break on +3 after two double plusses (birdies on 4 and 8). But whereas Porks had pluses on 10, 12 and 14, CJ had losses on those holes and in the end he needed pluses on 16 and 18 to right the ship and finish square for the round. He was joined on that score by Stan who did things the other way around to CJ, minus 3 in the first half followed by a strong + 3 second half.

Stan played well all day and if not for a duffed chip from a dodgy lie on the 15th and a missed small putt on the 18th he might have finished a few better, but then again we all leave a few out there every week don’t we. Good to see Stan back firing and in the points.

Johnny Q’s minus 2 for fourth placed points had a similar spectacular finish as last week, this time with a double plus birdie 3 on the 17th and a near birdie but solid par for a plus on 18. His front nine of minus 4 had been pretty dismal (he may have used a different word to describe it, but this is a family friendly blog).

Craig is hitting the ball well, but he was lamenting after the round that his putting is still letting him down. The scorecard says minus 4. Tee to green it should have been square or better. Targe and Steve also joined their fellow senior Craig on minus 4.

With CJ and Stan sharing the Seniors win on square, Craig, Targe and Steve’s minus 4 was good enough for second placed seniors points. This left two other young gentleman, Bob and Gordo to pick up a third placed seniors point with minus 7.

There was a quicker than usual exit from the course today, with the first group long gone to prepare for their Grand Final events by the time the rest of the field struggled in. This group of Gordo and CJ included a guest, Mick Dunn, who normally plays on Saturday afternoons, but snuck around with us as he had tickets to the game. CJ left with a smile on his face in anticipation of what would be on offer in the food and drinks department at his brother’s. Another quiet day in Priems World I am guessing.

This week it is the October monthly medal. Another chance for those not already qualified to get into the field for the David Primrose Champion of Champions event to be held on our Christmas break-up day on 21 December.

You can check the currently qualified field of 11 on Harry’s website under “Competitions”. Notable absentees at this stage include Brendon, Harry, Dan, Targe, Adam, Stan and both Priems brothers.

Coming off a quiet Grand Final day, I am backing a Priems for the October medal, or if Craig can get his putter going, he might win his third medal of the year, having saluted in June and August.

PS. For those like Harry who took a week off this week, you missed another classic opportunity to play on Ivanhoe sandscrape greens. We all said “WTF? Again with the sand? How many times is the sand needed FFS!” This week it was more dirt than sand, and very “sticky” dirt. Even a short putt collected so much dirt on its travels, you could hardly see the colour of the ball by the time it got near the hole. Hopefully one day we will get a payoff with perfect putting surfaces, but for this week’s golfers, and not just for Craig, putting was a very dirty business.

Results for Saturday, 28 Sep 2024
1st Ryan Porker (+3) 2nd Dan Marie (+1) 3rd Stan Blackshaw (□) 3rd Chris Priems (□) 4th John Quinlan (-2) 5th Craig Cameron (-4) 5th Steven Gervasoni (-4) 5th Targe Mifsud (-4)

Seniors Results: 1st Chris Priems (□) 1st Stan Blackshaw (□) 2nd Craig Cameron (-4) 2nd Steven Gervasoni (-4) 2nd Targe Mifsud (-4) 3rd Bob McDonald (-7) 3rd Gordon Hill (-7)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 15th Ryan Porker BallPin No 1 – 4th Ryan Porker BallPin No 2 – 18th John Quinlan

While the day’s winner played steady golf throughout, there were some big “2 for 4” shots out there this week, along with a very clear winner of the NAGA.

Brendon rolled in a monster birdie putt at the 4^th, grinning all the way as he walked it in and smiled “eclectic” as he picked it out of the hole and then wrote 2 for 4 on the scorecard.

Brendon is now more than two shots ahead in the eclectic, with Bobby and Raj in equal second place. How is the recovery going Raj? The smile did come off Brendon’s face when he 4-putted the next hole. Funny game golf.

Harry’s shot on the 12^th looked like it was going in the hole (or at least inside Brendon’s nearest the pin effort) but turned out to have rolled about 25 feet past. No problem, Harry drained the downhill birdie putt dead centre and happily wrote 2 for 4 on the scorecard.

Johnny Q played despite being crook (not self-inflicted this time) and while not having a great day, a birdie on the 17^th gave him something to smile about. But better was to come.

The pin on 18 was on the top tier, just. Any putt from behind the hole was liable to roll down to the bottom tier if it went past the hole. Coming up from the bottom tier was near impossible to get the length right. No problems for JQ though. His tee shot made the lower tier (and was good enough to win nearest the pin) and he then rattled the putt straight in to add a 2 for 4 to the 3 for 3 he made on 17. We won’t mention the airy John had under a tree on the second.

But the best 2 for 4 of the day came from Gordo. It left SoS scrambling the depth of the balls bag to try and find enough round things to pay the Eagles Nest prize.

With our eagles specialists Steff, Porks and Peps not playing as much lately, the Eagles Nest had crept up to 11 balls as Gordo got out his gap wedge in the middle of the fairway on the 14^th.

As soon as he hit it, playing partner Dan said “that’s good” soon followed by Steve saying “go in” and it did!

Michael, Harry and Brendon were on the 15^th tee and prompted by Dan and Steve’s urgings had time to turn around and watch the ball’s run across the green into the hole. It dropped at a nice slow pace, a perfect shot.

Amongst all these heroics, Blighty compiled the round of the day with steady golf and 38 stableford points. Apart from a wipe on the 13^th and a bit of trouble on the 17^th, Blighty’s round included five 3-pointers and eleven 2-pointers. Harry only chopped him 2 strokes for the win. Blighty’s form suggests he will lose a few more strokes in coming weeks.

Steve was a victim of the original tee on the third coming back into use, bemoaning the fact that “it is a long way to the ladies from back there.” A couple of gashes on the 8^th and 13^th hurt Steve’s chances of catching Blighty, but his 35 points saw him in second place on his own.

Brendan played a great back 9 with two birdies (12^th and 14^th) to add 20 points to his disappointing 14 points on the front. 34 points was good enough for third place. The birdie on 14 came after his drive just left of the green needed a kind bounce to finish on the green. Instead it hit the path and took a huge bounce onto the lower 15^th tee, from where Brendan hit a great pitch and then made a downhill putt. It looked like it might finish just short but went in with a very last roll, perhaps helped by a gust of wind.

Dan and Michael shared fourth place on 33 points. No great highlights in either round, although Dan’s was good enough to win the voucher for the A Grade inside comp (Blighty won B Grade inside). Michael’s most accurate shot with club in hand was an angry throw of the club after a duffed second on the 16^th. It hit the metal on his buggy in just the right spot to snap the club clean in half. Michael was last seen with Chris in the pro-shop talking repair options and rummaging in his bag to see if he has any vouchers to offset the cost of a new shaft.

JQ’s finishing flourish got him to 32 points for the round and fifth placed points.

Craig tried out a new driver and putter this week. After a couple of missed short putts it looked like it might end up like Michael’s club on the 16^th, but Craig then made good putts on 16, 17 and 18 and said the new putter will definitely be in the bag next week. The new driver was also a winner, with Craig hitting it longer without losing any Old Reliable accuracy. Watch out for Craig in coming weeks, including at the Cobram weekend.

I think the only one of today’s 10 players who hasn’t got a mention for his golf is SoS. Why is that I wonder? “None” was his answer when asked for highlights for the blog. Turns out it was a very solid NAGA effort from SoS, 5 shots behind 9^th place.

For those not distracted by Grand Final day (when, depending on your version of VFL/AFL history there is a rematch of the 1899 Grand Final between South Melbourne and Fitzroy) Harry has us scheduled to play Grand Par. This means your 4-pointers in stableford will count as +2 in Grand Par and anybody with the equivalent of a 5-pointer (for example a Blighty 2 for 5 on the 7th) will get +3 for the hole.

There will also be a whopping $10 jackpot on offer for the Propin on the 15^th.

Results for Saturday, 21 Sep 2024
1st Andrew Blight (38) 2nd Steven Gervasoni (35) 3rd Brendon Mitchell (34) 4th Michael Gourlay (33) 4th Dan Marie (33) 5th John Quinlan (32)

Seniors Results: 1st Andrew Blight (38) 2nd Steven Gervasoni (35) 3rd Michael Gourlay (33)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 15th Jackpot BallPin No 1 – 12th Brendon Mitchell BallPin No 2 – 18th John Quinlan

Eagle’s Nest Results: Eagle – 14th Gordon Hill

Neither rain, nor snow, nor sleet, nor hail shall keep the golfers from their appointed rounds. Ostensibly coined by Herodotus about 2500 years ago, it was never more true today. Ten plucky members set off with hope in their hearts, and a belief that there was a chance that the weather front would either miss, or, at least, pass not close enough to be a problem. Their hopes held good for a couple of holes, but, then, the rain arrived, accompanied by the occasional gust of wind. Fortunately, the snow, sleet, and hail did not eventuate. However, the wind proved to be sufficient to catch Brent’s umbrella and overturn his buggy. The umbrella ended rather the worse for wear, but Brent was heartened by the fact that it was only a $20 job. Dan’s buggy did not capsize, but his umbrella did a good impression of a fruit-bat when it turned inside-out and separated most of the struts from their hinges. There was a view expressed that it would not be a great day for scoring, and the casual water on the greens made for some interesting short game experiences.

Needless to say, there were a couple of members who had other ideas about the effect of the weather on the ability to make a score. The prime example of which was none other than CJ, who set about moving further into the future the day that he gives up the game. Despite his card sporting three singletons, he was able to counter that to some degree with a birdie on the 3rd which bought him a very nice four points. Another four holes that scored three, and the rest sporting 2 points, made for a total, at the end of the day, of 39 points. Yet another top spot in both the Club and the Seniors Championship. Michael’s marker complained about the lack of excitement as he had to record par after par on the card. He had to do this sixteen times before there occurred, what Michael styled, an ‘unfortunate’ bogey on the 17th. A par on the last meant that he was just one shy of playing the course in regulation in conditions that were somewhat less than ‘regulation’. Thirty-eight points was more than good enough to get second place, putting even more daylight between Michael and the rest of the field in both Championship tables. It also extends his reign at the top of the Order of Merit.

SOS seemed to have a bit of a thing about the second hole on each nine, as he managed to score a gash on both of them, which were just about the only blotches on his card. The miss on the 11th came about in a bit of an unusual way. His drive drifted left into the tree line, and was heard to make some sort of contact. The ball obviously came straight back and finished hard against the base of the pine tree between the roots on the green side. With no preferred lie, the ball was unplayable, and penalty relief was the only option. Despite the set-backs, and having to deal with getting relief from casual water on the greens, SOS still produced a very creditable 34 points to fill third place. Harry’s hands really gave him curry today, and SOS was a bit concerned about what was going on as he fumbled around in his trouser pocket for tees, ball markers, etc. The lack of a reliable grip did impact a few shots, but the main ‘problem’ was the number of putts that caught the edge of the hole, but didn’t drop. As a result, the final total was a mere 31 points, but that was enough for a spot in fourth place for the day. Old Reliable was not quite so reliable today, but reliable enough to make fifth place with his card of 28 points. He’ll take the point, regardless!

Michael does like to brag about what a good shot he is on the par threes. The ProPin was on the 4th, and, although he was just outside the limit, he just had to put his name and distance on the card. However, it was just one of those Danny days, and Dan easily took the money with his shot to 4.56m. Not to be outdone, Dan also got the closest on both of the BallPins on the 12th and the 18th. Wouldn’t you know it, he didn’t make the birdie on any of them, so young Dan did not contribute to the four that were scored for the day.

Gordo made his comeback today, and he owned up to having had a few putts, but this was his first swing of a longer club. He was necessarily a bit circumspect about the length of his swing, and, when all is said and done, the signs are looking promising as he only just missed out on scoring himself a point on the first outing. Craig’s group had pretty much called him a hole-in-one on the 15th. The only problem was that he had over-clubbed it a bit, and the ball hit the pin hard enough to bounce off far enough that Dan was able to get closer for the BallPin (apologies, Dan beat Craig on 18 for the BallPin). Bob had more battery problems today. Only, this time, it wasn’t his buggy that gave up the ghost, it was his hearing aid. CJ thought that he might have to play Dad today when little brother, Rob, lost it a couple of times. There might have even been one case of a UAP when a favourite implement headed for the trees. After a group hug on the 17th tee, they all headed down the steps to the buggies. Except Rob, who took the grassy route, and left an exquisite set of skid-marks down the slope, if not down his y-fronts. A salutary lesson for all, the steps are there for a reason – use them!

Results for Saturday, 14 Sep 2024
1st Chris Priems (39) 2nd Michael Gourlay (38) 3rd Stephen O’Sullivan (34) 4th Harry Boughen (31) 5th Craig Cameron (28)

Seniors Results: 1st Chris Priems (39) 2nd Michael Gourlay (38) 3rd Harry Boughen (31)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 4th Dan Marie BallPin No 1 – 12th Dan Marie BallPin No 2 – 18th Dan Marie