Only a couple made a FIST of it on 08 June 2019.

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Which twin has the Toni?

There were a number of factors that could have affected play today. There were the celebrations to mark the 75th anniversary of D-day. There was the women’s semi-final at the French Open. There were the celebrations to mark the Queen’s birthday. There was the rather frigid conditions that didn’t really start to ameliorate until about three parts of the way through the round. And there was the new competition format to be played – Sableford. Perhaps the latter explains why nobody in the field was able to play to their handicap today – read, was able to break their handicap. Once the sun did manage to get above the horizon and the bit of cloud burnt away, it really was quite a nice day. Absolutely no reason why 21 members and two guests shouldn’t have played their pants off.

Adam hasn’t been with us for long but the early ‘goss’ was that it would not be too long before he presented to the judges and today proved that to be the case. The current ‘goss’ has it that he missed a few putts today as well, so this might not be the last. Brendon, on the other hand hit the ball a couple of times more than appeared on his card as he showed off his incredible skill at deciding that the ball wasn’t going to go far enough and hitting it again with the same swing. Not just the once, but twice. Luckily for Brendon, under the new rules, they only counted as one shot on each occasion. Nobody is sure why he chose to put his tee-shot from the 17th onto the 18th green but he reckons he played to have his second shot rattle into the pedestrian barrier at the back of the green and stay safely in bounds. Thirty five points got the pair the eight points and just the winners penalty off the handicap for next week.

When Targe made the announcements, he thought that he was on the second podium spot on his ownsome. What he hadn’t accounted for was the inability of SOS and Jason to add up and so, in the end, he had to share the second spot but he gets just a many points so he is probably not too worried. He was certainly pleased to see that Harry didn’t have such a good day at the office today. SOS on the other hand is perfectly happy with the temporary green on the 3rd because, today, he managed to birdie it. The celebrations at the time could be heard quite widely and he did contribute to the rather small total of 5 birdies for the day.

The promotion of SOS did ease the crowding on the third step with Jason Simon and Whitey not having to cuddle up too close. That is more than can be said for the last step Noodles, Big Joe and Ken having to schmooze together to make room for Rod who managed to forget that he had two strokes on the 13th, of all holes, and got promoted into fifth place as a result.

The nearest the Pin competitions saw the ProPin being contended for on the 12th and Peter and Harry started the ball rolling with only millimetres separating the two distances from the hole. But in the end, it was all for naught as Brendon whacked his to 2.28m to take home the dosh. The first BallPin on the 15th was won by Whitey while the 18th went uncontested to Simon.

One of our guests today was Joe Demir who was a member a number of years back and he has now decided to make a comeback. So welcome back Joe. Because of the elapsed time and a lack of a current GA handicap, Joe will be putting in his three cards and if today’s is any guide, his old handicap would not have been a good place for him to restart. He has obviously been getting some practice somewhere.

There were two draughties today. Bob scored on on the 15th and Targe managed one on the 14th with a poorly executed cover drive that barely made it across the path beside the 14th tee. Also there were a couple of shots that Dennis defined as FIST shots (F*** it’s still there). Big Joe managed a woolly woofer on the 13th tee while Trev did manage to make contact with the ball but only moved it about 25mm in the process.

No, no, anything but the 17th!

There were a few problems with trees out there today. Harry caught the trees on the second and finished on the first green. After being urged by SOS to have a sh*t, the ball was struck cleanly and caught branches not quite cleanly enough to come back and finish on the green again. Ken was placed behind a tree between the 13th and the 10th. His chip caught the tree flush, the ball ran up the trunk, arced over his head and finished about 2m behind where it started. Ben’s ball had obviously heard about last weeks marathon and was so determined not to suffer a similar fate that it tried hiding behind a tree. Ben didn’t realise that there were preferred lies available today and played it as it lay. Pays to check the signage, hey Ben.

Allan had a couple of moments today. On the 16th, he took three putts from a metre from the hole and they were all a metre long. Then he was spotted pushing Thunderbird up the path from the 18th green (assisted by Adam) since the electrons had ceased to flow from the battery to the motor. It was later discovered that the key had been turned off!

Results for Saturday, 08 June 2019
1st Adam King(35) 1st Brendon Mitchell(35) 2nd Targe Mifsud(34) 2nd Stephen O’Sullivan(34) 3rd Simon Powell(33) 3rd Brent Rowley(33) 4th Peter Damou(32) 4th Jason Hopkins(32) 4th Dennis Ward(32) 4th Rodney White(32) 5th Stephen Butterfield(31) 5th Rod Grant(31) 5th Joe Wagenecht(31) 5th Ken Watson(31)

Seniors Results: 1st Targe Mifsud (34) 2nd Simon Powell (33) 3rd Dennis Ward (32)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin12th Brendon Mitchell BallPin No 1 15th Joe Wagenecht BallPin No 2 18th Simon Powell