Talk about doom and gloom!  The whisper around the course was that C# Minor had done a fetlock and that Shakey Isles was looking pretty shaky.  This news soon lead to speculation that just about anybody could have a Licence to Kill by the end of the day.  So twenty seven hearts picked up a little with the prospect that with a bit of luck there might be a chance to snatch an unlikely victory if only everything would go just the right way.  Unfortunately, it was not to be, as the rumours of doom and disaster turned out to be slightly exaggerated and, though the front nines were not what you would call spectacular, they were good enough.  Or perhaps it was that the rest of the field weren’t good enough.

Needless to say, Snags did not eat Brendon as he threatened to do last week and Brendon came good on the back nine to take out the event by a margin of 3 strokes but it could have been a lot more if he had not taken 4 of the best on the 16th green.  The investors in Shakey Isles will be well pleased with their investment.

One part of the speculation about a bolter taking it out almost did come true for Mal who showed some form that he has been hiding under a bushel in recent times.  Mal was rather bemused by the fact that he was declared Clubhouse leader while the last groups were coming in  and more so when he was not dislodged by more sets of cards.  In the end he did take out-right second place by dint of having only recorded his handicap as 23 when it should have been 24.  Fortunately, this had no effect on the Calcutta outcome as Licence to Kill was not on the market and so the second placed Calcutta horse was the old reliable C# Major.  Snags will just have to wait for another chance to feast on roasted Kiwi.

Mehmet and Steve had decided that they didn’t have much of a chance after their front nine performance and took a more relaxed attitude to their game.  It seems to have paid off in improved scoring, so much so that they managed to squeeze into 4th place a mere four strokes behind the winner.  They were joined by the Beast who had been in with a chance for the top spot after making up some ground on the front nine but a letting down of the guard on the back meant that the old one-two knock-out punch could not be delivered.  Or maybe Snags just talked him out of it.

Trevor also improved his hand this round and maybe it was the use of the cart that kept him firing right until the end.  As usual, there were tales of woe to be told but in the end it is the score-line that counts.  Michael joined Trevor on the fifth rank with a couple of very respectable rounds that suggest that the  shoulder problems will soon be a distant memory and he will be back to his best form before long.

The other event that was finalised today was the Club Stroke Play Championships.  As reported last week, Noodles had a fair grasp on the Nett score event and in the event that was more than enough to hang on to win with 201 nett after the three rounds.  Runner-up with 209 was another Kiwi that Australia has claimed as our own, in Brendon who managed to just about maintain the margin from last week.  In the off-the-stick side of the event, Pepsi (224) managed not to make too many poor shot-making decisions today to keep his lead in the event to finish a good four strokes in front of Michael (228).  The full table is published under the Competition menu items.

SOS and Rob had their hopes of seeing their first hole-in-one from the 5th tee when Harry’s shot on the 4th rolled past the hole less than a centimetre off line to finish about 70cm away.  The birdie was comfortably easy which must have been the case all over the course today as we managed to tally up 24 of them between us.  Unfortunately the 4th was not one of our competition holes but Stefan did manage to get himself a ball on the 12th.  The ink was hardly dry from Bob putting his name on the card when Stef’s rifled in to take it away.  Ah well, that’s what they say about 15 seconds of fame!  The ProPin on the other hand was rather more controversial.  One ball was measured before it was realised it wasn’t ours and that it actually belonged to somebody who was playing up the 9th.  Another was measured but not recorded because there was already a name on the ‘ticket’ in the box.  Turns out it was last week’s ticket but in the end the ProPin was awarded to SteveK for something that finished about a metre from the hole.

Stefan was hitting them long again today.  On the 6th, he neatly divided the group walking to the 7th tee with a ball that struck the garbage bin and which was, in all probability, saved from ending in the pond further back.  On the 14th, he did it again as they prepared to head to the 15th tee.  No malice, just youthful exuberance.  But he won’t be youthful for much longer if the birthdays keep rolling around as the Birthday Birdie reports that he has one coming up in the next week.  The Beast also took on the group in front but Ed was on the ball and called for his partners to watch out.  He kept walking though and the ball hit him on the ankle.  Didn’t deflect onto the green as Bill had hoped it would though.

After the game, Pepsi was noticed sporting some very colourful runners.  Seems he might have got them through a mate for the right price.  Trevor liked the look of Chrispy’s beer so he headed off and bought himself one to celebrate his result.  What he didn’t realise is how much the Club charges for a Millers Chill and did he carry on a treat.  Even Chrispy had a bit of a whinge.

Next week is the Champion of Champions Trophy event and all winners from this list qualify to play.  More than one qualification counts as one.  Check the Hall of Fame if you can’t remember what you won during the year but note that the HoF is for calendar year while the event is for the playing year, so it is the VOM from last December that counts.

• Any Monthly medal
• Fred Howe Cup
• Stuart Clarke Memorial
• David Ford Cup
• Vin O’Meara Memorial Trophy
• Fred Kitson Cup
• Annual Challenge
• Matchplay championship
• Club champion
• Senior Club Champion
• Club Stroke Play Championship

Those who did not make this list will play for the Chump of Chumps which, in the scheme of things, isn’t much.

After the event, there will be the Presentation of Trophies and the Christmas Lunch that usually includes a few free drinks on the Club.  Try to remember to wear your Club shirt as we would like to get a new group photo as well.

Results for Saturday, 12 December 2015
1st Brendon Mitchell(67, 69, 136) 2nd Malcolm Fleming(73, 65, 138) 3rd Craig Sharp(67, 72, 139) 4th Stephen Kelly(70, 70, 140) 4th Bill Eastoe(69, 71, 140) 4th Mehmet Akdag(71, 69, 140) 5th Trevor Jackson(74, 69, 143) 5th Michael Gourlay(71, 72, 143)

Seniors Results: 1st Malcolm Fleming (73) 1st Malcolm Fleming (65) 2nd Bill Eastoe (69) 2nd Bill Eastoe (71) 3rd Trevor Jackson (74) 3rd Trevor Jackson (69)

ProPin 18th: Stephen Kelly.  NTP 12th: Stefan belevski

A whole year of Championship points up for the taking and the club turned out in force to try to get a piece of the action.  Rod Grant is back on the come-back trail after a long outage getting various bodily parts rearranged and for a first full round in many months it might not be surprising that he wasn’t up amongst the front runners.  Regardless of the result, welcome back Rod and hopefully that will be the last of the break-downs.  A field of twenty seven is probably about as large as we have had in the history of the Club.  As a result, some people were drawn into the later groups and our international jet-setter was having a bit of a whinge about how he had been at the Course since 0630.  A bit like international departures when you think about it.

Another week off the Black markers and some people seemed to find that more difficult than the extra distance would dictate but it does serve to increase the value of accuracy and one or two suffered as a result.  However, there were a couple who took it in their stride and managed to play below their handicap to lead the field after the first round.   When the results were announced, Snags was heard to comment that he was going to eat Brendon next week.  Somebody thought that maybe he already had but that is another story.  So, having let the cat out of the bag, the two front runners after the first round are none other than Snags and Brendon who are both very keen to get off to a flying start with the double dose of points that are on offer.

But, lurking in the background, and also very keen to spoil their party, is none other than the Beast, who was careful enough not to break his handicap and who will be well placed to put the mockers on the both of them as the last member of the last group to tee off next week.  Oh, to be a fly on the wall!

One of our newest members is also well within striking distance and the family name will come into question if Steve manages to snatch the trophy from the leader’s grasp.  While speaking of bushrangers, Steve is joined in this rank by none other than Ed and John (Frequent Flyer) Q.  All would be quietly confident of their chances of putting together another good round to give the leaders a run for their money.

Mehmet spent most of the day ruminating on the amount of money that he had spent on various horses in the Calcutta and, in particular on his playing companion Pepsi, who managed to consume two weeks worth of handicap in trying to extricate himself from an impossible lie in a bush on the 8th.  Three swings, none of which could be positively said to have contacted the ball, though it did move from its original position, before he relented and took a drop for an unplayable, pretty much accounted for the strokes available.  Still, par-ing the course is not beyond the realms of possibility for Pepsi but at this stage, Mehm might have done his dough.  Right alongside Mehm is Michael who is well placed on the come-back trail and could easily cause an upset if he returns to his old form.  Snags reckons he complained the whole round though whether it was about how he was playing or about how Snags was playing was not at all clear.  Michael did seem to think that Snags had some sort of charm (of the witchcraft variety) that enabled him to recover from the unlikeliest of situations by playing several ‘shots of the day’.

Taner started off the day with a nine on the first and that would have been enough to put most people out of the contest.  But, with the benefit of his generous handicap, and a modicum of that Cypriot tenacity he pressed on and is still in there with a chance if he can eliminate the odd big score that blighted the card.

As for the rest, the chances of streeting the field seem less than likely short of a major terrorist attack taking out the leading groups.  Rob started off the day like a house on fire with pars on four of the first five holes.  But, at some stage, the wheels fell off, both figuratively and literally.  The game went down-hill but on the 16th up-hill, the wheel fell off his buggy.  This mishap was down to some maintenance done the previous night to ensure his gear was in the best possible condition for the day’s outing.  Noodles thought he had lost something on the 1st and rather than walk back he rang Mehm to get him to check.  When asked what he thought he had lost the answer , apparently, was ‘my phone’.  However, Mehm has been known to bulltish from time to time, so the story is repeated with some reservation.

Ryan had some close calls on the draughtie front and on more than one occasion according to reports.  Harry was not so lucky on the 2nd when the pine tree intervened and prevented his well struck, if errant, shot from making it to the red markers.  Dennis managed to put his tee shot on the 15th to within a metre of the hole to take out the ProPin.  That only took him two more shots to get the ball into the hole whereas on the next he took five putts to achieve the same result and four of them were inside that same one metre distance.  Brendon was rather upset that the last group had not managed to pick up the marker and the box from the Nearest the Pin hole on the 12th.  The reason for his interest became clear when it was discovered that it was his name on the ticket for the ball.  It seems he really needed it to replace the one that he lost OOB on the 13th.  He also did not make the birdie after his close approach and the whole field only managed 14 which is a pretty low strike rate for the size of the field.

In the Stroke Play Championship, Noodles retains a fairly handy lead in the Nett Score side of the competition and if he can put together another reasonable round the trophy could very well be his.  On the Gross Score side of the table however, the situation is a much more close run thing.  Despite Pepsi’s brain fade on the 8th today, he still holds the lead but he is being closely pressed by Michael and Noodles so the outcome is still up for grabs.  Can Noodles pull off the unlikely double of both Gross and Nett?

If anybody has major trophies still gracing their mantelpiece or gathering dust in the attic, could you please bring them in next Saturday or get them to Gordon earlier if possible.  This will allow engraving to be organised and to have them available for presentation at the break-up and Champion of Champions (and Chump of Chumps) on 19 December.

Membership subscriptions are also now due and can be paid in cash to the Treasurer or by Direct Debit into the Club bank account.  The account details are on the web-site.

Results for Saturday, 05 December 2015
Leaderboard Round 1 1st Brendon Mitchell(67) 1st Craig Sharp(67) 2nd Bill Eastoe(69) 3rd Stephen Kelly(70) 3rd Ed Kloprogge(70) 3rd John Quinlan(70) 4th Mehmet Akdag(71) 4th Michael Gourlay(71) 5th Taner Kemal(72)

What a beat up!  Twenty-one members turned up to see the front runners in the Championship slug it out for the trophy of the year and they all lay down and came in with the same score and outside the points and so the position from last week was entirely unchanged.  Congratulations to Ryan on becoming the Club Champion for 2015 in his first full year in the event.  Mehmet managed to run the whole year without taking a winner and probably set some sort of Club record in the process to come in as runner-up.  Just proves you don’t necessarily have to be a winner to be a grinner.  Gordon did have a chance to pip Mehm for second if he had won today’s event but, in the event, he would be pretty happy with his third placing.  Noodles was just a little too far behind to catch up with Gordon with today’s win of the December Monthly Medal which really was the main event today.

And he did it in very fine style with equal par on the back nine and only five over on the front to come in with a nett 62.  Not bad for a bloke who was on the verge of giving it away a week or so ago.  Of course the big question now is, will he be able to repeat the performance over the next two weeks in the Vin O’Meara and the remaining two weeks of the Stroke Play Championship.  Some of the bidders in the Auction seemed to think that he could.

CraigC had a bit of a shaky start to the front nine with a couple of hiccups further along the track before really getting his mojo together and running in just one over par on the back.  So, for a long time it looked as if his 68 nett was going to be enough to collect the prize but it was not to be.  Still he can be consoled by the fact that he put his tee shot on the 15th to 1.9m of the hole that was more than enough to collect the dividend from the ProPin if not the Monthly Medal.

Pepsi showed his credentials for the VOM after a couple of average rounds in recent times and carded a 69 nett but there is no truth to the rumour that he wanted to get a let out on his handicap to improve his grip on the Eclectic.  Noodles and the Beast were in contention to overtake him and both did their best by carding fresh birdies but the handicap cut for Noodles did not help his cause and the Beast fell short of pulling off an unlikely win in the event by a mere 0.3 of a stroke.  While on the topic of birdies we managed a fairly substantial tally of 18 today and that did not include any from the follow up on Craig’s ProPin or from Harry’s Nearest the Pin for a ball on the 12th.  Embarrassingly, Harry’s second putt was longer than his first though it was a down-hiller.

Next to zim up to the podium to collect his points was Zimmer who also seems to have positioned himself well for the next couple of weeks and certainly seemed keen to bid himself up in the Auction.  Following close behind were an unlikely pair of Bob and Blighty who collected a couple of Seniors points for their matching 71 nett scores.  Those points for Blighty were enough to break the tie and give him outright second in the Seniors while the points for Bob and Craig weren’t quite enough to catch Harry who had to settle for third spot in the Seniors Championship.  Gordon didn’t really need any more but he took one just the same.

Bob might have been a bit lucky to finish where he did after his tee shot on the 17th was on the verge of being declared lost or out of bounds in the scrub when it was discovered by one of the group.  A punch shot out of the thicket finished off the edge of the green and Bob proceeded to chip/putt it in for a birdie.  Go figure.  However the ‘unusual’ shot of the day would have to go to Noodles on the 6th tee which was low and off-line so much that it hit the ‘tombstone’ half way up the tee in front.  The ricochet headed the ball in the direction of back down the 5th but imparted so much spin that the ball curved back onto the 6th and finished on the fairway up by the bunker.  Maybe not the 250m that the fellows were claiming but still a pretty good result.  Other than that, he was apparently lovely to watch – but then all the girls say that.

Chrispy spent some time on the driving range during the week and got a few pointers on how he should be hitting the ball without his power fade.  He’s not game to try it on the course because he can’t bring himself not to aim way to the left.  SteveK and ChrisV are still scratching their heads after balls were lost on the first after not appearing to be headed for any trouble.  No crows or black holes were noticed in the vicinity and the walk back to the tee was a long one.

Brendon and the Beast decided to play a match on the back nine for a coffee and Bill was licking his lips at the prospect with Brendon dormie with three to go.  The prospect of having to buy the coffee was so much anathema to Brendon that he set to and won the last three holes to square the match and so avoided having to buy the coffee.  The things some people will do to save a quid.  Blighty reckoned he was going alright until he had two fat ladies on the 16th.  It’s been a while since the last game of Bingo but the recollection is that two fat ladies is actually 88.  But then again maybe he really did have two fat ladies on the 16th and didn’t score too badly.

Gordon was trying to deter bidders in the auction by continually referring to the fact that he couldn’t putt, an obvious reference to the fact that he had taken 5 putts from about a metre an the 6th.  It wasn’t that he was proud of the fact, it was just that he wanted to keep his price down to reduce his potential half share cost.  Trevor was a keen bidder in the auction usually after announcing how badly the horse had performed in today’s event.  Very likely another ploy to keep the price within his budget, which he seemed to have spent almost to the cent by the end of the day.

In the Club Stroke Play Championship, the nett score leader board will be the same as printed below.  For the off-the-stick event, the current standings are AndrewP (72), Noodles (73), Zimmer (78), CraigC (79), Michael (81).  A full Leaderboard will be published in due course.

The tallies for the Calcutta will also be circulated and monies owing have to be paid before tee time next Saturday.  Any horse sold that does not front next week, the buyer will have the money refunded.  Money for horses that start but do not finish will remain in the pool.  Purchasers are responsible for offering half shares to the jockey and collecting the money for same.  That is, the Treasurer will only accept the full amount owing for a horse in one transaction.  The monies will also be collected for the Calcutta raffle ($25 to buy yourself).  This is not compulsory and the best placed horse from those entered will be declared the winner.  Ties will split the pool equally.  Please read the Calcutta Rules under the Rules Menu above.

The Vin O’Meara marks the start of a new Competition Year and the winner of this event often goes on to become Club Champion so, if you have nominated, come along and increase your chances for the end of the 2016 year.

Results for Saturday, 28 November 2015
1st Stephen Butterfield(62) 2nd Craig Cameron(68) 3rd Andrew Petricola(69) 4th Kazim Akdag(70) 5th Andrew Blight(71) 5th Bob McDonald(71)

Seniors Results: 1st Craig Cameron (68) 2nd Andrew Blight (71) 2nd Bob McDonald (71) 3rd Gordon Hill (72)

It was raining today but not exactly those little water droplets from the sky though there were a few of those around as well.  No, compared to recent times it was raining birdies and 15 players (including the redoubtable Ken who graced us with his presence after quite a break away) managed to card a total of 14 of the little beasties.  Ken’s even counted for his Yellow Ball team but to no avail as the annotations on the card were littered with comments like ‘Bloody Targe’ as it seems the little fella contributed four minuses to the teams eventual score of -3.  It must be said that he did redeem himself by scoring a plus on the 17th.  But, three of the four teams did manage to finish with their balls intact and the two other teams tied it up with a final score of -2.  So, lots of Bonus Points handed out today and as the Championship leaders group were in it together today, the result won’t affect the outcome of the big play-off next week.

And, Simon was on fire today, particularly on the back nine where he racked up five on the black side of the ledger that more than compensated for the two in the red on the front.  A couple of birdies indicate that he is getting the measure of the course and the new artillery seems to be working a treat at getting him on or around the green from where the short game did not let him down as evidenced by a knock down putt from off the green on the 4th for his birdie.  He is now champing at the bit for the new season to start with a clean slate for everybody so that he can have a full year’s run at the Championship.

For a while Mehmet was in second place and he was pleading for Ryan to be kept out of the points.  But, then along came Bob with a card that reported +2 and Mehm sadly waved goodbye to two of his valuable points and said hello to the prospect of having to win next week.  However, it seems that the prospect of 2 strokes on the 13th went to Bob’s head (as well as his marker) where a square on the card actually turned out to be a miss.  So, Bob dropped back to joint second and Mehmet was promoted and got his valuable two extra points.  Michael was also there on +1 and this augurs well for him on only his second outing after injury.

The Beast started out well on the first with a birdie and then with great confidence took the yellow ball for the team on the second.  It took the full search time to find the resultant sprayed shot.  And so it went, good result, not so good result but he still ended up with a square card and he managed to put the ball onto the 4th close enough to pick up the Nearest the Pin for a ball.  Noodles was more consistent by squaring the majority of the 18 holes to also manage a square card alongside Bill.  Noodles also managed to put his tee shot on the 18th to within 2.5m to take out the ProPin but he wasn’t able to sink the putt.  Michael was also on the card about a metre further out but he did manage to sink the putt.

As much as Mehm wanted to keep Ryan out of the points, and he soundly berated the membership for not being able to produce a score between square and -3, it was not to be and Ryan came in at fourth spot alongside Harry.  So the margin is five points and it is possible for Mehm to wrangle a tie with only a second place (provided of course that Ryan is pointless) and set a standard to top the Championship table without a win to his name.  So, there is bound to be some argy-bargy out on the course next week as the boys battle it out.  Could be worth coming even if for no other reason.

So, after the place shuffling, Targe managed to sneak in and salvage a point.  He was well out of the Seniors listing but there is still a chance for some tie breaking in the minor placings for this prestigious event.  Bob has moved up into equal third with today’s result.

Pepsi, still holds the lead in the Eclectic but if Noodles and Bill can manage a couple of birdies on critical holes, they still have a chance to snatch the trophy from his grasp.  But, with only one week to go, it is going to be a tough call.

Although three of the four Yellow Balls did return, there were quite a number of near misses.  Targe went close to putting theirs in the tank on the first.  After Bill’s effort on the 2nd, Blighty flirted mightily with the OOB fence on the 3rd and Harry, ditto on the 17th.  Chrispy was apparently the guilty one that launched his teams ball into the wild blue yonder.

Gordon came out with high hopes of doing well today and keeping himself in the race to overtake Ryan but it seems that he might have had a case of stage-fright and he finished well down the table.  Or maybe he is just protecting his handicap for the start of the new season of competition.  Taner also came to earth with a thud (his words) and didn’t score too well after last weeks performance.  You can only blame the handicap for a couple of those points, Taner.

Ken’s passage down the 3rd was something less than auspicious with at least two trees and other roughage conspiring to put him off the edge of the green for four.  Oh, and it was the Yellow Ball to boot.  Not to worry, says our Ken, and proceeds to sink a 15m putt for a square.  Maybe that’s how they do things at Rosanna.

Next week is the December Monthly Medal and first round of the Stroke Play Championship that runs for three weeks including the two weeks of the Vin O’Meara.  We will be running the usual Calcutta Auction on the VOM after the barbeque after the round.  So, we really would like to know who will be playing the VOM but there are still a lot of people that we haven’t heard from re their intentions.  So please, email/phone Harry as soon as you can so that the form guide can be organised and the Auction List can be prepared.

The Christmas break-up party will be on 19th December and we also need numbers for catering for that so if you can let Gordon know your intentions one way or another asap, that would be good.

Results for Saturday, 21 November 2015
1st Simon Powell(+3) 2nd Mehmet Akdag(+1) 2nd Michael Gourlay(+1) 2nd Bob McDonald(+1) 3rd Stephen Butterfield(□) 3rd Bill Eastoe(□) 4th Harry Boughen(-3) 4th Ryan Porker(-3) 5th Targe Mifsud(-4)

Seniors Results: 1st Simon Powell (+3) 2nd Bob McDonald (+1) 3rd Bill Eastoe (□)