What do you reckon could push the Russian invasion of Ukraine off the front pages, out of the talk-back topics, and be a major topic of conversation on Saturday? Nothing less than SKW pulling stumps! CJ had a bit to brag about, as he reckons he is one of the few people not to have been bowled by the world’s greatest leggie. Of course, this was back in second grade district cricket and Warnie was only a 14 year old, but he could still turn a mean ball.

There was a bit of a dump of rain overnight, and although the radar clearly showed that the frontal band had passed, it was enough to put off a fair number of fair weather friends. As a result, the field was reduced to eight members and Geoff, who fronted up again to submit his second card for his handicap determination. Although there had been 50 or 60mm of rain, there was very little evidence on the course, other than a couple of puddles in the low spots and some almost visible moisture on some of the greens. Open cracks were still evident, so the course can take quite a bit more moisture before it is likely to suffer significant saturation. There was a bit of a mist from time to time, but, in general, it was a great day for golf, and those that chickened out, missed out.

Now, you would think that having a double figure score on your card would just about be a death knell for your chances in a stroke event. Which just goes to show how wrong you could be. After a nice drive on the third, Harry’s second caught the tree on the right of the corner, and finished in bounds but unplayable. The next, after the penalty, was struck nicely, but neatly connected an overhanging branch and finished well OOB, never to be seen again. And so the count continued to climb, with the ball finally in the hole for ten (maybe it should have only been nine on working back through the shots). The golf gods then decided that they had had enough fun for one day, and H was able to complete the round in just 65 more strokes (38 for the back), to come in with a handicap equalling score of 68 net.

Brendon didn’t stray too far from the straight and narrow, although he did rack up an uncharacteristic triple on the 6th. A minor confrontation with another player over an ‘iridescent’ ball on the 13th did not stop him from scoring a birdie on the 14th, which meant that he did contribute to the total of six that we scored for the day. He probably thought he had a chance of contributing more when he put his drive on the 15th to 2.3m, which was more than enough to win the ProPin, but not enough to score another bird.

For a third of his card, it looked as if CJ was going to record nothing but fours and sevens. Fortunately, he was able to break out of this pattern, thanks to a large degree to his having fallen back in love with the ‘Collingwood’ putter that was gifted him by Michael some time back. He reckons he was seduced into buying his latest cast-off by a trick test green that channelled the ball to the hole. CJ’s short game has always been one of his strengths (other than his famous power fade), but today he was sinking putts from just about any distance. This brought him home, in the end, with a net score of 74 and that gave him the points for third place.

Now, it has been a little while since we have seen Stef at the ‘Hoe for a number of reasons, and it was wondered whether he would have forgotten how to hold a club. Just like riding a bike, he leapt out and scored a birdie on the first. Not sure what happened on the second, but he used all of his handicap of five strokes to complete that one. He was able to put his drive on the 18th close enough to take out the BallPin on that hole, but, with the pin perilously close to the edge of the ledge, his putt finished well down on the bottom level which could easily have robbed him of a higher placing. ChrisJ lost his ball from the tee on the second after it disappeared into the tree line, and this resulted in a less than impressive score for the hole. Playing up the 6th, Chris spotted a ball lying at the very base of one of the bushy trees, and, lo and behold, it was the stray ball from the 2nd. He was adamant that it had not been there when searching at the time, and it must have just fallen down. Nobody was game to dob SOS in for anything, and his card showed no particular bright or black spots. A couple of triples was about as bad as it got, and that was enough to bring him home with his net score of 75 to share fourth place with Stef and Chris. Having been tail-end-Charlie last week, Keith was more than happy to get a point for 5th place with his score of 81.

Geoff had a couple of shockers, but there was a fair sprinkling of bogies and a couple of pars on the card, which suggests that he is getting his feel for the game back into line. It was certainly good enough to score him the BallPin on the 12th. The golf gods might have turned their attention to Stan when he was playing the 6th. His drive proved a bit difficult to find, and it was finally located in ‘a bit of a hollow’. It turned out the bit of a hollow was actually a sprinkler head, and the club hit the sprinkler rather than the ball. A bit further down the track, the club did hit the ball, but in such a way that it spun backwards and finished behind where it started. Some days are diamonds…..

The Birthday Birdie has a couple of milestones to mark this week. ChrisJ and Mark both have a reason to celebrate as they move just a little closer to joining the ranks of the Seniors Competition, although it is still a fair way off.

If you have looked at the Matchplay draw, you might have noticed (or not) that the round dates do not correspond with the Calendar. This will be fixed soon. In other news, as a finalist from last year’s Matchplay competition, The Comeback Kid (Stef) has been granted a spot to fill one of the Byes and will come up against Mark in Round 1. Please get on with organising your matches, and don’t forget that there will be no matches played during Majors or the Priems Cup.

Results for Saturday, 05 March 2022
1st Harry Boughen (68) 2nd Brendon Mitchell (71) 3rd Chris Priems (74) 4th Stefan Belevski (75) 4th Chris James (75) 4th Stephen O’Sullivan (75) 5th Keith Delzoppo (81)

Seniors Results: 1st Harry Boughen (68) 2nd Chris Priems (74) 3rd Keith Delzoppo (81)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 15th Brendon Mitchell BallPin No 1 – 12th Geoff Lyall BallPin No 2 – 18th Stefan Belevski

What a day! Another beautiful, balmy sort of a day. The coffee boy took pity on us again and set most of the tees well forward. Still no significant rain, so the run available just keeps getting better and better. Unfortunately, this means that the bare patches are getting barer, and the number of lies between tussocks is increasing exponentially (or so it seems). You would have to say that conditions were ideal for the fifteen members and one guest to shoot the lights out as far as scoring went. For some, it looked as if the lights were just out.

As of last night, the wearing of masks is no longer compulsory. For a couple of members, they probably should have kept theirs on. Not because of any risk from COVID. Only because of the risk of being hung for being a bandit. As early as the 12th tee, Trev was predicting massive cuts to Brent’s handicap, with thirty points and four birdies to his name. That birdie run meant that Brent was responsible for a fair proportion of the ten that we carded for the day. It was suggested that Trev was just trying to put the mockers on him, and whether this was the case or not, Brent only managed an additional twelve points in seven holes to finish with a very impressive 42 points for the round. Brendon, on the other hand, had only managed to score 27 points by the same stage of the round. However, he was able to rack up 15 points for the seven holes to bring his score to 42 to share the honours with Brent. Brendon claimed not to be aware that he would only lose half a stroke for winning, so he should be happy with his ‘slight’ reduction.

RodG hasn’t been all that regular in recent times, and only racked up his second game for the year today. The Thursday nine holes seem to have formed a pretty good basis for practice, rating a podium finish in both outings and a very impressive strike rate of four after today’s tally of 35 points was good enough to fill second place with daylight between there and first. Stan started off like a house on fire and looked set to emulate the two Brens with ten points after four holes. Unfortunately, the putting left him for a few holes and a series of three putts cost him dearly. He regained some of his mojo on the back, and managed to roll home into third place, just one point behind Rod on 34 points.

Here’s where things deviate a bit from the announced placings. It seems that there was a bit of a cross-over between Club cards and GA cards. Gordon, played pretty impressively on the front nine, and was right up there with a chance when he turned with 20 points to his name. Things went a little cross-wise on the back, and he could only scrape up another 13 to finish with 33 to take out the 4th spot on the podium. ChrisJ also put in a bit of a slump on the back nine to scrape into 5th place with his 32 points. Targe probably isn’t used to his recent handicap cuts and claimed a point where one was not due, and that dropped him back into his share of fifth. Reports have it that Porks ‘played up’ a bit last weekend with the Punter’s, so that could explain the rather nasty run of gashes and singletons that limited his total to 32 points and a share of fifth as well.

Things looked as if they were going to be a bit of a feast for Brent today after he managed to put his name on two of the three NTP cards, including the jackpot ProPin on the 4th. Unfortunately, Gordo put paid to that little hope when he lobbed his in to 2.86m, and he was the recipient of ‘more shrapnel than Ukraine’ as one member so indelicately put it. Brent also had his name on the BallPin on the 15th, until old smiley face, Brendon, came along and rained on the parade. For the ball on the 18th, Stan was not confident that his shot would be close enough to stand. That premonition proved to be correct, and the ball went to ChrisJ.

We welcomed a potential new member, Geoff Lyall, today for his first card outing with us. Geoff has played a bit of social golf and is a bit out of practice, but when he hits the ball it certainly does stay hit. When he hit a tree, it stayed hit and the ball travelled so far back that he had to retreat some 50 or 75 metres or so to play his next shot. Welcome to the Club, Geoff. Speaking of shots that finish further away than where they start, Trev was on the bottom deck of the 18th and suffered the indignity of his putt not making it up the hill and coming to a stop further down the green than where it started. Whether more than one attempt repeated the performance is not clear, but there were reports that he took four putts to get it to stay on the top deck.

Old Reliable wasn’t on his top form today and put one on the 17th into some deep rough that required an ‘axe’ shot to get it out. Ryan’s day was not all bad. Or was it. On the 16th, he was behind a tree with what appeared to be an impossible shot to the green. A shot, best described as a shank, achieved the ‘impossible’ and put the ball onto the green for the putt to produce a par for the hole. And, while on the subject of shanks, SOS was noticed sending a ball in what was obviously not the intended direction at one stage.

Goss from the Punter’s has been pretty thin on the ground, so maybe it is a matter of what happens at the Punter’s stays at the Punter’s. There have been some leaks however (sounds just like Parliament!). There was at least one ‘air swing’, and that was in a chipping competition that was played after the round. It is not clear how many gin shots preceded the air shot. One thing that was probably fairly predictable was that the punting was not profitable, despite pulling in a couple of quaddies. Top marks went to JQ and Gordo for manning the spit roasts and keeping the hungry beasts fed. Mehm and Porks, saved them from going thirsty, which could have been the reason that SOS was noticed using the couch on a number of occasions. BrentR won the golf under fairly benign conditions and, despite a bit of a ‘choke’ on the last three holes for no points, El Presidente, Rob, filled the second spot. Pepsi tallied up enough points to be awarded third place.

Despite what the Calendar says, the AGM will not be held next week. Various matters have prompted the Committee to postpone it until 26th March. Notice of the meeting will be distributed shortly. In the meantime, give some consideration to who you would like to run the Club for the next year. All Committee positions will spill, and it is open to any member to be nominated to stand for any of the positions. The list of positions available can most easily be found in the Committee Members item under the Contacts tab on the web-site. Committee Nomination Forms are also available for download from the website in the left hand panel on a PC. Unfortunately, it is a bit of a scroll on a mobile.

Results for Saturday, 26 February 2022
1st Brent Loeskow (42) 1st Brendon Mitchell (42) 2nd Rod Grant (35) 3rd Stan Blackshaw (34) 4th Gordon Hill (33) 5th Chris James (32) 5th Targe Mifsud (32) 5th Ryan Porker (32)

Seniors Results: 1st Rod Grant (35) 2nd Stan Blackshaw (34) 3rd Gordon Hill (33)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 4th Gordon Hill BallPin No 1 – 15th Brendon Mitchell BallPin No 2 – 18th Chris James

For a while there, it looked as if there might be a field of one. After a stir up, the numbers trickled in, and we had enough for a competition with a couple to spare. A subsequent withdrawal meant that, in the end, there were seven ‘non-punters’ who took to the field, and questions were being asked, would anybody miss out on points or would all of the points on offer need to be allocated? It was a beautiful day, the sun was shining, the birds were singing, and the whole world was happy. The course was well mowed, and the greens were good, if a little littered with fallen leaves and bark. The ground was quite dry and there were even a few cracks showing in places, and some bare patches made for some awkward lies if you were unlucky enough to finish in that particular spot. There was plenty of run to be had, and the low trajectory ball often had much to recommend it. So much so, that Keith’s drive on the 8th won the long drive for the group by a considerable margin.

Another factor that could have contributed to the potential for good scoring was the fairly benign set-up of the course. Whether this was in compensation for the tee placements at Moonah or not, but the placement on the second, in particular, came in for comment as something the likes of which had not been seen before. What’s the bet that the hole will be about 100m longer next week! The conditions obviously suited Old Reliable, who managed not to stray too far from the straight and narrow to card 74 off the beater and a very respectable total of +3 points.

ChrisJ started off with a flurry with a massive drive, a pitch onto the green and sank the putt for the birdie. Despite the forward tee, the second hole did not produce a similar flash of brilliance, with erratic ball contact playing havoc with the outcome. And so, the standard of his game oscillated for the balance of the front nine to finish the half at one under the pace. Things settled down for the back half, and a final result of plus 2 was not to be sneezed at. Targe earned the sobriquet of The Professional from a lone golfer who joined in to complete the second group when he started out, also in fine style. The little fellah also picked up his game a notch on the back and, despite missing numerous putts by mere millimetres, he managed to snare a share of second place and to continue the whittling away of his obviously over-generous handicap.

Michael has had a bit of a break from golf for a number of reasons, not least of which was a dicky knee, that did cause him some concern that he might be coming back too soon. His fears were largely unfounded, as he seemed to take up exactly where he left off, if not a little better, as is often the case after a break. If it had not been for a few putts that missed by a whisker, the bottom line might have been rather better than the +1 that resulted. It should be added that a couple of ‘putts’ from off the green holed, so maybe it was swings and roundabouts.

BrentL seems to have been completely unfazed by the rather steep fall in his handicap, and today he played right to the mark to take out the fourth spot. Brent had his chances, and a bit of a slump in the middle of the back nine made all the difference between a good break and the square result that eventuated. Harry’s front nine fell victim to the ‘just missed putt’ syndrome as well, much to the frustration of Michael, who could not help but suggest some small change in set-up or technique. Michael felt much vindicated when H smashed a long putt on the 14th, to the dead-centre of the pin, where it dropped in for the birdie. This was one of seven for the day, which is not such a bad total from the small field. H’s back nine was much improved over the front, and he was able to eke out the fifth placing with his final total of -4. Yes, he knows he should be embarrassed to accept it, but a point is a point!

Unfortunately, the lack of more tied scores meant that one person did miss out on getting a point today. Won’t mention any names, but he did appear briefly on television recently. The ProPin today was on the 4th, and, although the green was well surrounded, nobody did manage to get close enough to claim the $7 on offer, so the Pool will jackpot to be contested again next week. The first BallPin was on the 12th, and Michael thought he was in with something of a chance. That is, until Old Reliable came along and spoiled the party and collected the ball on offer. It was a different story for the second BallPin on the 18th, where Michael was unworried by any competition and collected the ball in that case.

The Matchplay seeding draw will be made after the round next week. If you want to be in it and have not registered, then you had better do so sooner rather than later. No registration, no place in the comp. Last year’s finalists who register will be seeded 1 to the number registered. The rest of the seed positions will be filled by draw from the hat, and the standard 32 player single elimination table will be filled as appropriate. That is, No1 plays No 32, 2 plays 31 etc. Less than 32 in the draw means byes in the first round for the top seeds. We currently have fewer than 32 registrations.

Results for Saturday, 19 February 2022
1st Craig Cameron (+3) 2nd Chris James (+2) 2nd Targe Mifsud (+2) 3rd Michael Gourlay (+1) 4th Brent Loeskow (□) 5th Harry Boughen (-4)

Seniors Results: 1st Craig Cameron (+3) 2nd Targe Mifsud (+2) 3rd Michael Gourlay (+1)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 4th Jackpot BallPin No 1 – 12th Craig Cameron BallPin No 2 – 18th Michael Gourlay

Perfect conditions yet again at old Ivanhoe greeted 15 members on a Sunny Summers morning. It was good to see Blighty, Beast and Adam for their first rounds for the year and none other than Adam put in a consistent days play to be the solitary player to play under his handicap. 1st place on 38 points was the final score with no wipes scored at all for the round.

Ever reliable Craig was not too further back on 35 points and after the round he was telling everyone that unfortunately he has to make the trek to Tassie this week for 7 rounds of golf over 5 days. What a tough life. Craig’s round also included a birdie on the hardest hole on the course (arguably) on the 13th, which was one of around 9 scored for the day.

Andrew’s return also included a birdie on the 12th and his name on the pro pin sheet, but porks wrecked his day and put his tee shot just inside the marker to 2m to steal the cash. Nonetheless both ended up with equal scores on 34 points and a share of 3rd place. Porks started his round pretty poorly with a few early double bogies but the enticement of a free beer sparked his round after a bet with Bill for a beer on the same 12th hole.

JQ was quietly plodding along nicely and ended just shy of his handicap with 33 points. Some could have thought he was looking after his handicap before the punters club trip next week.  Not to be outdone, Harry and Trevor both rounded out the placings with 32 points. Trev’s round included two holes of 4 pointers and he had also twanged his back a little on the 9th but soldiered on to complete the round strongly nonetheless.

Craig was the leader in the seniors followed by Andrew in second. Harry and Trevor also shared 3rd place. There were no reported drafties but some very close calls. Stan just cleared the red markers on the 15th, Targe was saved by an OOB/draftie combo on the 3rd by a skinny little bush which flicked his ball just in front of the red markers.

The first ball hole prize was on the 7th hole and the tee markers were three quarters back which was a bit of a challenge. Matty brushed this aside and ended up pin high which was close enough to win. The 18th hole wasn’t as much of a challenge with a front tee and pin position although by the end of the last group no one had claimed to have reached the green. Bill was still cursing to himself after enticing porks earlier with a bet for a drink and decided to double down on the 18th, but again this just resulted in another tee shot from porks to 1.7m. Gordon was less than impressed when reading out the results with porks on the markers again.

Reminder to all to register for the matchplay competition which starts in 3 weeks. Harry reports that 22 members have registered so there are still quite a few that have not indicated their preference. Registration is at the top of the clubs website. It takes about 26 seconds to complete. Do it now.

Results for Saturday, 12 February 2022
1st Adam King (38) 2nd Craig Cameron (35) 3rd Andrew Blight (34) 3rd Ryan Porker (34) 4th John Quinlan (33) 5th Harry Boughen (32) 5th Trevor Jackson (32)

Seniors Results: 1st Craig Cameron (35) 2nd Andrew Blight (34) 3rd Harry Boughen (32) 3rd Trevor Jackson (32)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 12th Ryan Porker BallPin No 1 – 7th Matt Hunt BallPin No 2 – 18th Ryan Porker