Gordon confidently filled his umbrella holder with pencils, cigar tubes and other assorted paraphernalia with the quiet confidence of somebody who knew it wasn’t going to rain, despite the rather heavy looking clouds that were hanging around.  As it turned out, his confidence was well founded as the cloud eventually moved on and out came the sun to warm the cockles of your heart.  After the round Pepsi was lolling back in his chair soaking it all up and declaring “How good is this?”  So good that twenty one players (including one guest) did their best to tame the wildness that is Ivanhoe Public Golf Course.  Some were more successful than others on the course taming front leaving some with the prospect of showing their prowess at the bar-be-que table or needing to post a phenomenal turn-around to have a chance for a podium position.  In golf, as in life, anything is possible, however unlikely.

There was one man who reveled in the conditions that were presented today and so, you might well ask, why is there a picture with two smiling faces in the post.  Well, first, DennisW has to head off to the US of A to meet a family that will soon be linked to his through a nuptial event and he won’t be available to play next week.  So, despite the possibility that +5 could be sufficient to win the event at the end of the day, Dennis will just have to grin and bear it and take a cut to his handicap as well.  It’s tough but those are the rules.  And second, Dennis had nicked off before a picture could be taken.  Yes, there are pics in the archive but it was too good an opportunity to pass up.

So, as a result of all that, the competition leaders for next week will be Harry and CraigC who played together but did not mark each other’s card so there was no chance of collusion.  Harry was so enthusiastic that he stepped up onto the 3rd tee confident that the group in front was out of his range.  As his ball headed down the right side of the fairway, who should step out of the bushes?  None other than Ed, who made it known that he was not happy.  Craig just plugged away quietly and went close to being the man of the moment for his group.  With a big Jackpot riding on the 18th, the group agreed that the proceeds would be split in the event of a win.  Craig responded by putting his on the green.  Despite measuring from the hole to the ball and the ball to the hole, the measurement came up the same, 5.05m.  Damn!  So, a super-duper Jackpot next week on the 18th that some people reckon they would rather win than the trophy and the points.  Sorry Fred, if you are watching.

MattN seems to be getting his game settled down after a bit of a rough start after joining us and he has been featuring in the finish on a regular basis of late.  His +2 will see him well placed to make a lunge and capture a fine piece for the fire-place (on the mantel, that is).  And only needing a little more of a lunge on +1 we have another Matt of the H variety and Big Man Ed who once again made his presence heard around the course (not including abusing Harry).

Those in fifth place have just a little bit more work to do with their cards of -1 but, in Par, a four point turn around is not impossible and so they cannot be counted out of the calculations.  This group includes Trevor, Bob, Ryan and Chrispy.  Now, it seems that Chrispy’s effort was one of dogged determination as the putts refused to fall for him and while Chris is known for being able to give a bit of lip, having the ball lip the cup again and again started to get to him.  When the group got to the 18th tee, Chris had more birdies on his card that he had pars.  He evened up the tally with a par on the 18th.  But, in his way, Chris did contribute to the total of 14 birdies that we managed to gather together.  Possibly a bit on the light side given the good conditions.  And, a few people need to get a few more strategic ones in if they want to dislodge Blighty from the top of the Eclectic table.

The Nearest the Pin competition is getting very interesting.  The BallPin was on the 4th and there is a pernicious rumour about that this is Harry’s favourite.  That is not strictly true but he was able to put his ball to pin high and a couple of metres away to take out the ball.  What would have been the favourite hole today was the 12th, which was the location for the mobile ProPin, but unfortunately his shot was 5.5m away.  But, nobody else was able to worry it and so there will be a Jackpot to next week.  The first sighting of the pin placement on the 18th, on the top deck close to the change in level elicited the comment that it would be tough again today.  Even though the pin was re-positioned onto the lower deck (note MIchael) the result was as reported earlier.

Bob is a hard man to please and a number of times during the round he was upset when the ball didn’t finish where he wanted it to.  Does it ever?  Trevor was heard to ask, “Why do I keep doing that?”  The simple answer, Trev, is just stop doing whatever you are doing.  Brendon’s Dad was here again and played a score exactly the same as he did last week so he is nothing, if not consistent.  He is heading back across the Ditch with a driver that used to belong to Brendon.  He hit it so well today that Brendon is thinking of charging him for it.  Always in for a quid is Brendon.

Gordon had a hard time of it today as his short game in particular abandoned him.  At one stage he was considering reverting to his Jack Newton persona and playing one handed.  At one stage he could have been accused of making a club perform aerial gymnastics, though, to be fair, he was returning it to the vicinity of his bag and buggy.  It is not clear in which direction Noodles chose to launch one of his clubs.  Now, we know that some members are a little more vertically challenged than others.  So, was it or was it not surprising for Ed to ask whether Targe had turned up late when he spotted SOS from a distance on the course.  And, getting back to Gordon, he was fishing through the pockets of his Club vest when he pulled out a handful of money.  It seems it was the Club funds from a couple of weeks back that he thought he had lost somewhere and had to make up out of his own kick.  Always pays to check every possibility.

There was a Committee meeting today.  A few points of interest as it relates to the Calendar for next year.  The Annual Challenge will be at Rich River on the first weekend in October.  This will push the Monthly Medal and Fred Kitson back by a week.  In each month in which there are two Par Club Events, the second will be a GrandPar Competition in which you can score multiple positive scores.  For example, if you birdie a hole with a stroke, you score two points etc.  Not much different to normal Par, but people will feel better about it.  The downside is that the bonus points will count towards handicapping.

It was also decided that the Club Membership fee would be increased to $30 per year.  The Committee realises that this is a substantial jump but it is many years since the last increase.  The fee for GolfLink membership will remain the same at $90.  The Committee also asks that members pay their subscription at their earliest opportunity by making a bank transfer to the Club Account attaching your name to the transaction.  If any current member reading this is planning to discontinue their membership/GL membership, can they please advise, preferably in writing (email) so that we can get our registers in order before the deadline to avoid un-recoverable charges.

Results for Saturday, 14 October 2017
Leaderboard Round 1 1st Dennis Ward(+5) 2nd Harry Boughen(+3) 2nd Craig Cameron(+3) 3rd Matt Nicholls(+2) 4th Matt Hunt(+1) 4th Ed Kloprogge(+1) 5th Trevor Jackson(-1) 5th Bob McDonald(-1) 5th Ryan Porker(-1) 5th Chris Priems(-1)

Seniors Leaderboard: 1st Dennis Ward (+5) 2nd Craig Cameron (+3) 2nd Harry Boughen (+3) 3rd Ed Kloprogge (+1)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin No 1 12th Jackpot ProPin No 2 18th Jackpot BallPin 4th Harry Boughen

Footy season over?  Nice spring weather?  A Medal up for grabs?  Last minute dash for points?  Whatever the reason, we had what could be a record field for this October Monthly Medal.  There were twenty eight sent out from the first tee with a consist of 26 members and two guests.  One of the guests was Brendon’s Dad who is visiting from across the ditch for a couple of weeks.  The other was a friend of Joe. Brent by name.  Unfortunately Brent aggravated a wrist injury and retired hurt after nine holes but he assures us that he will be back to get his cards in and join the Club.  A big welcome to both.

The preferred lie sign was nowhere to be seen so it was back to ‘real’ golf.  MattN reckons that all amateur golf should be preferred lie given that the courses are generally not as well groomed as those used by the pros.  But, despite that slight lack of perceived advantage, there was quite a bit of run on the course and this led a few to sample the delights of the slightly ‘rougher’ rough.  The weather was a bit chilly to start and the dew hung around on the sheltered greens until well into the round.  The sweeping of the greens looks to have fallen by the wayside.  Perhaps we need Simon back to sweet-talk the ground staff.

The lack of preferred lie advantage and the dewy greens were no obstacle to our eventual winner who came home by the length of the straight.  Jason fairly played out of his skin to card an 80 off the stick for a nett score of 62.  The round was only marred by a triple bogie on the 8th.  Jason collected a swag of pars but he did not manage to card a birdie and so he did not contribute to the grand total of 12 for the field.

Brendon obviously benefited from coaching by his Dad as he was able to come into second place with a nett score of 67.  It wasn’t all smooth going between father and son as there was a need to get clarification of the rules relating to areas of relief from lateral water hazards at one stage of the round.  The query did not relate to Brendon’s ball and he was heard to say ‘I told you so’ or words to that effect.

Pepsi could probably be forgiven for starting off with a bit of a wobble following the recent passing of his father.  Black armbands were worn and President John expressed the Club’s condolences to Pepsi and his family..  However, like the true stager that he is, Pepsi got his game back on track and finished off the round with 72 by the beater for a handicap equalling 68 nett.  It’s hard to keep a good man down.

Brent was a single stroke behind in 4th place with 69 and the last spot on the podium was filled by MattN who came in with 70.  With only five points getters (doesn’t happen very often) and the large field there was some discussion as to whether the ball run could/should extend beyond the podium positions.  Notionally, there were seven balls for distribution but there were three players with the next best score of 71.  This would have exceeded the ball tally in any case but for the record, the ones who missed out were Ryan, Blighty and SOS.  SOS made the call, by the way.

The Ball Pin today was on the 7th and playing from the white markers it should have been a long shot.  Curiously, on a number of holes today the whites were in front of the blues and this may have been the case here as well.  In the event, the man who got his name on the ticket to collect a ball was none other than Chrispy.  JohnQ acted as tee marshall and made to call to put the event on the 7th, which he later regretted after he put his drive on the 4th to within ‘gimme’ distance of the hole and dead in line.  There is photographic evidence but it is not to hand but can be posted when it comes to hand.  The first ProPin was on the 15th and Joe hit one of his better tee shots for the day to get his name on the card.  Unfortunately, the Beast came along later and put one closer at 3.26m to take out the cash.  The second ProPin on the 18th went begging once again and the kitty now stands at $66.  So, depending on numbers next week, there could be anything up to $90 up for grabs.  A great incentive to turn up in anybody’s books.

Harry had decided that he needed to come second every week for the rest of the year while keeping Michael out of the points to catch him in the Championship with maybe a win in the December Monthly Medal to steal the big prize.  After draining a 6m putt for birdie on the first, things looked to be off to a good start.  Or was that a bad start?  Turned out it was pretty ordinary in the end.  On the other hand, the flat stick abandoned Targe today and despite putting for par on at least eight holes, he did not manage to score one until the 18th.  No wonder he is off the Kangaroo Island.  But that performance pales into insignificance when compared to certain members of the Priems family.  Jake took a total of five putts to get it in the hole on the 11th and Chrispy and others were fairly heaping it on him as a result.  On the very next hole, karma took her revenge and Chrispy managed to take six (putts, that is) for a total of 9 on the hole.

There was a curious tale of a draughtie today, the only one reported and paid.  Dale played his tee shot (notes say it was the second) and for some reason there was a thought that it might not be found so he played a provisional that hit a tree and bounced back almost to the point of departure and definitely behind the red markers.  A search located the first ball which was also behind the red markers and so it was deemed that it was only a singleton draughtie rather than a doubleton.  Another member to get off lightly was the Beast who hit one on the 3rd that was possibly out of bounds.  His provisional hit a tree out to the right so hard that it bounced back and finished across the 5th green.  Luckily for Bill, the first ball was found to be in bounds.  Blighty also flirted with not getting past the reds on a number of occasions but we all know how Andrew hates to part with his cash.

The Birthday Birdie has been on holiday in Italy so if anybody has missed out on a birthday call in the meantime then please accept a late one now.  There is one to send out this week and that is to the big fella, Snags.  Have a good one, matey.

The first round of the Fred Kitson is on next Saturday and there will be the usual bar-b-que lunch after the second round the following week.  The Committee will also be meeting next week after the round and, if you have any items that you would like the Committee to consider, get in contact with your friendly committeeman and give him the details as soon as possible.  Note, this is not a general club meeting, only the committee.

Results for Saturday, 07 October 2017
1st Jason Hopkins(62) 2nd Brendon Mitchell(67) 3rd Andrew Petricola(68) 4th Brent Rowley(69) 5th Matt Nicholls(70)

Seniors Results: 1st Andrew Blight (71) 2nd Bill Eastoe (75) 2nd Harry Boughen (75) 2nd Targe Mifsud (75) 3rd Keith Delzoppo (79) 3rd Trevor Jackson (79)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin No 1 15th Bill Eastoe ProPin No 2 18th Jackpot BallPin 7th Chris Priems

Storm and pestilence met all the hardy players who turned up for a soggy round of golf. Many of the few who arrived to play were in fact ready to turn around and go home given the possible washout – however Noods for one was not going home given the Championship leader Michael G was there ready to go. Game on.

The 2 groups proceeded to have a rather pleasant day around the wet and muddy course. Gradually over the morning, the surface water retreated and conditions were not as bad as they first appeared. Michael Gourlay played a lovely game to finish with a +3 (69 off the stick) and won the day by what is likely a record margin of 6. Second place shared by Noodles and Brent Rowley (-3), third on -4 were Eddie K and Brendon Mitchell, fourth on -5 Gordo and Chrispy (his first Championship points since May) and Blighty came in fifth on -9.

Highlights:

* Greatest winning par margin of 6?

* Seniors championship points started allocation at -4

* Gordo succeeded in hitting his golf ball whilst making a practice swing! and played his tee shot on the 18th after the ball rolled off the tee onto the ground, putting it pin high and then proceeding to 3 -chip and wipe the hole.

* Blighty made 8 consecutive wipes on the back nine then parred the 18th – his demeanour through all this was stoic.

* Blighty was most pleased to receive championship and senior points for his -9

* Michael and Eddie have called a truce on their playing relationship.

* Harry and Porks both enjoying world travels so the report and handicaps and championship is limited.

Copyright – Gordon Hill Esq.

Results for Saturday, 16 September 2017
1st Michael Gourlay(+3) 2nd Stephen Butterfield(-3) 2nd Brent Rowley(-3) 3rd Ed Kloprogge(-4) 3rd Brendon Mitchell(-4) 4th Gordon Hill(-5) 4th Chris Priems(-5) 5th Andrew Blight(-10)

Seniors Results: 1st Ed Kloprogge (-4) 2nd Gordon Hill (-5) 3rd Andrew Blight (-10)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin No 1 12th Michael Gourlay ProPin No 2 18th Jackpot BallPin 4th Stephen Butterfield