Yearly Archives: 2023

The BOM was forecasting rain, but the radar looked pretty reasonable as nineteen members ventured out to tackle the first round of the VOM, and, for some, the second round of the Strokeplay Championship. There was a bit of a mizzle, that was just enough to dampen everything down and to make the greens just that little bit slower, which resulted in more than a few putts finishing short of the mark. There were a couple of ‘dry’ breaks, but, just as the first group was finishing on the 18th, they pulled out the plug in the hold below, and the ship was going down. Actually, the other way around. There were a few good impressions of drowned rats to be had as the later groups straggled in with their tales of using chippers and wedges on the greens in, sometimes, vain efforts to loft the ball over the water lying around. There was even a suggestion that Rob’s chipper shot on the 17th actually ‘floated’ as it stopped on the edge of the hole and didn’t fall in. Archimedes would probably have something to say about that!

This was like water off a duck’s back for Pepsi, who managed to sink some long putts despite the water-logged greens to card a one over back nine. And that included the after effects of a draughtie on the 17th tee that resulted in a bogie and beers for the boys. Matt, for one, was certainly relishing the freebie. After a four over on the front, he was able to present to the scrutineers with 73 off the stick and a net score of 67, leaving the rest of the field with a bit of catching up to do next week.

SOS was probably feeling that he was struggling a bit as he turned after nine holes. Only a single par on the 9th and a triple of doubles had used up a fair proportion of the handicap. That par marked a bit of a turning point in his fortunes, and the par tally reached five after the next five holes. It was at this stage that the rain would have set in, and the scoring proved to be slightly more difficult. In the end, he finished up with 85 off the stick and a net of 70 to score second place on the leaderboard. The big question is, can he crash-tackle Pepsi and get his name on this final major trophy for the year?

Harry and Michael were in the lead group, and probably had the pick of the weather conditions. They started out as clubhouse leaders, and held that heady position right until the last group handed in their cards. Harry might have been a bit on the rusty side after his break for a bit of international travel, although he did have a bit of a warm-up during the week of just nine holes. The real disappointments of the round related to some problems with trees on the second, for a quadruple, and the boundary fence on the 8th, for a triple. A very respectable 40 on the back nine restored some pride and resulted in a net of 71 to fit into 3rd place. Michael scored a bogie on the 3rd, and expressed the view that he had displayed all three of the deadly faults in his game in the process. He did manage to pick up four pars out of the next six holes, but he was less than pleased with his 40 off the stick for the nine. Pars on the next seven holes looked to be turning the round into something respectable and competitive, but some poor club choices (according to Michael) and poor putting left him with bogies on the last two to finish two over par on the nine, and tied up with Harry for 3rd place.

Stan is also just back from OS, although he did own up to having played a round (not around, at least that he is owning up to) in England. He rented clubs, and thinks it was probably the same left-handed set that he used some years ago at the same course. His score today was not helped by the shot that placed him in an unenviable, and unplayable, position at the base of a tree. Josh put in a very steady round, but reports suggest that if he can put in some work on his short game, he will be a force to be reckoned with. He was playing the 17th at the height of the downpour, and smashed a putt, only to see it heavily braked by the water to finish less than halfway to the hole. Heart-breaking stuff! ChrisJ creamed his drive from the 11th, only to see it trickle into the pond to the right of the green. As he took his drop, he had a bit of a laugh as Rob found the pond from the 12th tee. In what was probably karma, Chris promptly shanked his drive from the 12th into the pond as well. Brendon had nothing to report, and he probably considers his card to be less than average. Nothing really good, and nothing really bad, just not good enough. He ended up with a net score of 73, which was precisely the same as Stan, Josh and Chris, and they all shared the fourth podium spot for the day. Only one shot further back in fifth place on the leaderboard were a trio of hopefuls in Matt (they’ll let anyone into the Seniors, it seems!), Adam and Raj, with a net score of 74. Something must have distracted Raj in the walk from the 9th green to the 10th tee. When it was his turn to tee off, he thought he had misplaced his ball and walked back to his bag to get it. When he could not find it there, he looked in his hand, and there it had been all the time!

In the Nearest the Pin competitions, somebody chose to put the first BallPin on the 7th on a Black tee day. Undaunted, everybody tried hard, and several ‘almost’ made it. One person did make it, and that was Brendon, who collected another ball for his collection. The second BallPin was on the 18th, and Michael put a hopeful entry on the card, but he was easily knocked off by ‘Mango man’ Ken. Thanks Ken! There was a Jackpot ProPin on the 15th, and Michael made another hopeful entry on the card with his shot to 4.12m. In this case, that distance was enough and the dosh will be coming his way next week as he had to dash off to a five-year-old’s birthday party. He was really looking forward to all the activities at Bounce. The length of the putt was beyond him, and his card did not show any of the feathery blighters today, so the total of six for the team were down to others entirely.

Ken reckons that he couldn’t have bought a putt today, and Gordo claimed to be similarly afflicted. So much so that he was planning to come along with a supply of Weet-bix next week. The only saving grace for Gordo was a couple of pars on the last two holes. CJ bought himself a flash new wedge, and he was out to christen it today, although maybe he hadn’t planned on quite so much water on its head. First use on the second, and, wouldn’t you know it, he chipped it into the hole. The wedge probably wasn’t involved, but on the 15th, his first drive was likely OOB. The provisional definitely was. The second provisional was short of the green, lying five (potentially). The original ball was found in bounds, so the eventual 4 was a very welcome result. CJ also reckons his electric buggy is not well suited for the wet. Despite having ‘wet weather’ tyres, it struggled on the hills, and actually turned turkey a couple of times as he gunned it to keep it moving. Porks had a bit of a shocker on the 16th after he over-shot the green and lost his ball in the long stuff on the bank behind. Anything less than the quadruple would have had him on the podium, at least. Geoff had his ups and downs, but the low-light was probably the draughtie that he scored on the 5th tee.

The Birthday Birdie has been somewhat remiss while fluttering around overseas. Belated wishes therefore to BrentL, Sean and Rajesh over the last few weeks. If there are any others that have missed a mention, consider yourself wished as well.

Results for Saturday, 02 Dec 2023
Leaderboard Round 1: 1st Andrew Petricola (67) 2nd Stephen O’Sullivan (70) 3rd Harry Boughen (71) 3rd Michael Gourlay (71) 4th Stan Blackshaw (73) 4th Josh Hunt (73) 4th Chris James (73) 4th Brendon Mitchell (73) 5th Matt Hunt (74) 5th Adam King (74) 5th Rajesh Mahto (74)

Seniors Leaderboard: 1st Harry Boughen (71) 1st Michael Gourlay (71) 2nd Stan Blackshaw (73) 3rd Matt Hunt (74)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 15th Michael Gourlay BallPin No 1 – 7th Brendon Mitchell BallPin No 2 – 18th Ken Watson

With the exception of this week’s winner, Chris James, who was grinning after the round like the proverbial Cheshire cat, the quality of golf had the rest of the field looking very glum.

Stephen, a guest of Rob’s who joined us for his first game in 12 months or so summed it up well when he noted mid-round that he’d rather be out on his boat.

Mind you, if you head back to Chris’s second hole of the day, he wasn’t grinning then, taking a 9! Apart from a par on the first his whole front 9 was a bit of mess, turning in 49 off the stick, 14 over par. Given his handicap is 13, he’d already spent all of his handicap (and one more) by the time he stood on the 10th tee. No problems, a par on 10, birdie on 11, pars on 12-15, another birdie on 16, par on 17 and he stood on the 18th tee 2 under off the stick for the back 9. Bogey on 18 was an unfortunate finish, but still good enough for a back 9 32 to go with the front 9 49 for an 81 off the stick and 68 net (we will have to get Harry to check whether a 17 shot improvement from one nine to the next is a record).

Chris’s 68 net saw him comfortably win the day by three shots from our new Club Champion Raj who went 45 39 for an 84 off the stick for a net 71 which was good enough for second place on his own.

Raj’s 5 championship points for second takes his point tally for the year to 111, with Brendan in second with 89.

There was some interest in third place in the Championship today with Porks starting 3 points behind Harry. When Harry called in sick, it was all set up for Porks to sneak past him into outright third with a second placing or better today, or tie for third in the Championship with third place today (and cost the club an extra trophy). Indeed Porks 79 off the stick (net 73) was good enough for equal third place with Charlie G, who as predicted is starting to consistently feature in the points, and Matt.

SoS and Josh shared 4th with net 75 and Michael and Peps played poorly and were embarrassed to be included in the points sharing 5th with net 76. Those out of the points in the field of 13 (plus two guests) included Rob, Targe, Bill and Geoff.

Unfortunately for Rob, despite the big build up in the previous blog, he couldn’t improve his eclectic score today and this leaves Brendan the winner of the Eclectic Trophy on 44.0 with Rob second on 44.4. Brendan’s birdie on 13 last week was the decisive moment in his win.

This week is the first week of the three week Club Strokeplay Championship (the last two weeks being played concurrently with the Vin O’Meara). There are gross and net honours for the Stroke Play. The “gross” field is very bunched with Porks 79 good enough to lead, followed by Michael and Matty on 80, Chris J on 81, Peps on 82 and Raj on 84.

Josh was grinning big time when he creamed his drive and then a 5 iron onto the 6th green in two. Unfortunately this was followed by three putts. His dad playing in the following group duly birdied the 6th just to let Junior know he has a way to go yet.

In his first game back for a while Geoff distinguished himself with a duff off the first tee that didn’t make the ladies. He bettered this off the 13th when his tee shot managed to scuttle into the red marker, lifting it off the ground momentarily as the ball deflected way up the hill to the left just inside the out of bounds markers.

Such was the dearth of good golf to be talked about post round, discussion focused on the new clubhouse renovations, particularly the height of the new urinals, which appear to assume that all Ivanhoe golfers are 6ft plus. It was suggested that some stepping stools might be needed for our more vertically challenged members.

Peps spectacular effort on the 11th also got good press after the round. Not so much his regulation par on the hole, but rumour has it when the group ahead (not from our club) stopped and gathered in a little huddle of 6 or 7 blokes for a lengthy chat with some friends playing the second, which went on and on and on, Peps then decided to make what was described as a “decisive intervention.” Whether he ran through the huddle Dermet Brereton style or just used his verbal assets to get the job done is best left to the imagination, but Pep’s playing partners reckon they have never seen a huddle of 6 or 7 blokes scatter quicker. Don’t mess with the Peps!

Peps also finished strongly to win the nearest the pin ball on the 18th, with Raj taking the ball on the 7th. The Propin on the 15th was won again by this year’s most consistent winner, initials JP.

Results for Saturday, 25 Nov 2023
1st Chris James (68) 2nd Rajesh Mahto (71) 3rd Charles Gibbs (73) 3rd Matt Hunt (73) 3rd Ryan Porker (73) 4th Josh Hunt (75) 4th Stephen O’Sullivan (75) 5th Michael Gourlay (76) 5th Andrew Petricola (76)

Seniors Results: 1st Michael Gourlay (76) 2nd Targe Mifsud (80) 3rd Bill Eastoe (81)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 15th Jackpot BallPin No 1 – 7th Rajesh Mahto BallPin No 2 – 18th Andrew Petricola

There was a bit of the usual brotherly argy bargy and a touch of sledging during the build-up for the second round of the Priems Cup in 2023.

By the time the dust settled on registrations, a couple of withdrawals and a late starter or two, there were two teams of 8 with one unlucky “odd number” player – Anthony – missing out on a spot on either team.

Somewhat controversially there was a slight tweak of the format and rather than individual matchplay, it was decided to play a straight stableford round (with no match play) and the winning team to be decided by best total stableford score.

The early buzz around the course was that maybe an old friend from the UK, the legendary David Primrose, had turned up and secretly snuck into the field, because somebody had birdied four of the first seven holes and was standing on the 8th tee at 3 under the card off the stick. Closer inspection revealed it was another legendary member with UK connections, the Beast. Birdie on the 1st, then a cracker off the tee into the 4th for another birdie (and the quintuple Propin jackpot) then two more birdies on the 6th and 7th! The Beast was on fire!

Bogies on 8 and 9 saw him turn 1 under the card off the stick and with 24 stableford points. Another birdie on 14 (Harry what is the record for number of birdies in a round?) was a good bounceback after a double bogey on 13. Bill finished the back 9 with 17 points for 41 overall which was six ahead of the next best, Chris J (or “the other CJ” as somebody called him) on 35.

Bill was playing for Team Chris (the original CJ) but unfortunately his teammates weren’t able to support him well enough to get Team Chris over the line, with Stevie G and Raj on 33 the next best followed by scores in the 20’s for Whitey, Gordo, Chris himself and Josh.

Meanwhile Team Rob was playing slow and steady tortoise to the Beast’s fast starting hare and with a consistent set of scores in the 32-35 range from 6 of 8 team members, this was enough to secure victory with a team total of 261 points at an average of 32.6 per player. Team Chris finished on 236 points (average 29.5) so in the end it was a comfortable three shot victory for Team Rob.

Congratulations Chris J (35); Charlie G (34); Bobby (34); Targe (34); Brendan (33); Rob (32); Sos (30) Matty (29)! Due to various mathematical and computer programming ramifications of not playing matchplay, it was decided by Harry/Michael that the winning team members would get 2 championship points each. In the previous matchplay version, the winners of individual matchplay games would have received an additional 3 points. There will need to be some sorting out of the best arrangements for Priems Cup format and points allocation in 2024, so that Harry’s fancy computer programming code for points can reflect the format played.

The main championship impact of the Priems Cup round was that the points Brendan secured for the win were enough to put him nine points clear of Harry in second place for the Championship with one round remaining. With Brendan having to sit out this week due to a commitment for his kids (hope the dancing concert goes well Brendan) he can be safe in the knowledge that even if Harry wins the 8 points for the December Monthly medal this week, Brendan can’t be be beaten for second place. But Harry (80) can be beaten for third by Porks (77).

The other big trophy related story for the day also featured Brendan. A birdie on the 13th, one of 3 he scored for the day, was his first birdie on that hole for the year and saw him sneak ahead of long-time leader Rob in the Eclectic. If you take a look at the Eclectic under “Competitions” on the website you’ll see there’s a bit of Harry’s usual mathematical and computer programming wizadry involved, but basically it is – best score on each hole over the year then subtract three quarters of your exact handicap. So we have Brendan on 51 gross minus three quarters of his handicap gets him to 44.0. Rob is on 59 minus three quarters of his handicap = 44.6. It’s probably a race in two and with Brendan at the dancing concert, Rob could pull ahead if he snaffles a birdie on any of holes 2, 4, 5, 6, 8, 10, 15 or 16. Stevie G, Porks, Chris J and SoS are also a chance if they go nuts with multiple birdies on the right holes.

Other highlights of the day included Raj having an airy under a tree on the 8th, Bobby might have had one too. Whitey had the distinction of hitting a decent long shot down the 6th just a bit right of the green towards the big dead tree there – well indeed very towards the tree, in fact right into the little gap in the roots and neatly nestled against the trunk. Sorry Whitey I lost the photo of it! Josh’s wedge into the second was equally spectacular, beautifully struck and nicely lofted just right for it to get into the tree nice and high and stay up there!

Nearest the pins were taken out by Stevie G on the 12th and Chrispy on the 18th, a consolation prize for the defeated brother.

It was great to see Craig down at the club. Unfortunately Craig’s health issues have kept him off the course for a while now, but he is still firing away with all the Club Committee Secretary duties (see more on Committee decisions below). The losing team members seemed to be in very good spirits after the round, no doubt helped by Ken’s generous mango handouts.

At the risk of making this the longest blog ever, please keep reading for the important Committee information Craig asked to be included:

1. Membership subscriptions for 2024 were set to remain at $40 for Club and $90 for GA. These are now due, and should be paid as soon as possible, and certainly by the end of December. Bank transfer is preferred, marked with your name to identify your transaction.
2. The Xmas break-up lunch and trophy presentations will be held on the 16th December in the newly renovated function room and Gordon really needs to have numbers so that he can pin down the catering. Don’t be afraid to come along even if you haven’t played much during the year as it is your subscription money that pays for this sort of thing.
3. Because of the general lack of numbers of bidders in the Calcutta Auction, it was decided that this aspect of the Club’s activities would again be discontinued for this year. The optional buy-yourself pool will be continued with the purchase price for yourself set at $30. The pool will be divided as set out in the Calcutta Auction Rules. The purchase money is due before tee off on 2nd December. No money, no chance of being the winner.

Results for Priems Cup round Saturday, 18 Nov 2023
Winner: Team Rob 261 points, average score 32.6. Chris J (35); Charlie G (34); Bobby (34); Targe (34); Brendan (33); Rob (32); SoS (30); Matty (29)

Not quite the winner: Team Chris 236 points, average score 29.5 points. Beast (41); Stevie G (33); Raj (33); Whitey (29); Gordo (27); Chris (25); Josh (24)

Winners team each player rewarded with 2 championship points. Other team zero points.

Individual scores:
No points awarded and no “winner’s” penalty for Beast but he loses 5 x 0.2 = 1.0 for the 41 points

1st Bill Eastoe (41) 2nd Chris James (35) 3rd Charles Gibbs (34) 3rd Bob McDonald (34) 3rd Targe Mifsud (34) 4th Steven Gervasoni (33) 4th Rajesh Mahto (33) 4th Brendon Mitchell (33) 5th Robert Priems (32)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 4th (quintuple jackpot) Bill Eastoe BallPin No 1 – 12th Steven Gervasoni BallPin No 2 – 18th Chris Priems

With apologies to Chris James (equal first today) and Targe (Seniors winner today) the day belonged to Raj.

Having endured three weeks of no points, including a very unlucky 6th in the Freddy Kitson (4th each of the two weeks but somehow 6th overall) and stalled on a nervous 98 points with Brendan sneaking up within range, it was a crunch week for Raj as he stepped onto the first tee with Brendan playing in an earlier group and setting the pace.

Both Brendan and Raj work in IT and it is rumoured they had run the numbers through a few Optus computers during the week and come up with a simple formula. If Raj got points this week and matched or beat Brendan, he would be unbeatable for the 2023 Club Championship. Brendan needed to score at least 3 more points than Raj for the week to still be in with a chance for the Championship.

Despite blips on the 5th and 8th, Raj hit the turn at +1, one ahead of Brendan who turned square. With 3 pluses and a loss over the next four holes, Raj stood on the 14th tee at +3. Brendan had managed a plus at 10 and then a birdie at 11 to reach +2, but bungled the 13th and was at +1 for the day as he walked off the 14th green.

The nerves might have kicked in at this point because Brendan managed three losses in a row at 15, 16, 17 and Raj did the same at 14, 15 and 16. Raj’s loss at 16 came in spectacular fashion. With a one foot putt left for a par and a plus, Raj not only managed to miss it, but the one on the way back as well! 3 putts from a foot! Earlier Brendan’s loss on 16 had been equally spectacular. Wedge in hand after a huge drive, he airmailed the green (allegedly hitting his wedge 150 metres) into what was variously described as kebbidge (sorry I can’t spell in Kiwi) cabbage/jungle up the hill at the back of the green. Gordo was nowhere to be seen after the round. Apparently he had made a dash to the races, but some people were worried he was last seen heading into the jungle looking for Brendan’s ball.

Raj was able to steady with par for a plus on 17 and a half/square down 18 for a score of +1 which was good enough for a share of first and 8 (and a 106 in total) championship points. Brendan made a consolation plus on 18 and finished at -1 for the day. Importantly this was enough for him to sneak into equal second place with a bloke a new member Tim referred to as “Ryan”. The confused Apprentice Assistance Handicapper checked the membership records and it turns out Porks first name is Ryan.

Now Harry is still in Europe and it is rumoured he was thinking of doing a return trip dash back from Europe to play this weekend and try and protect his podium position behind Raj in the Club Championship. He will likely be displeased that his main competitors for the podium, Porks and Brendan, shared second place points. Brendan now has 7 points on Harry in second and Porks is only 3 behind in fourth.

In and amongst all this, Chris J also managed +1 for the day and equal first place. In a statistical quirk that any “Stan the Statistician” handicapper will appreciate, it just so happens that Raj and Chris J started the day with exactly the same handicap (13.7 = 14) and both lose 2 strokes to 12 (12.4). Both should be aiming for single figures in 2024.

Also overshadowed by the Raj/Brendan show was Targe who played well for a -2 and third place points along with first place points in the Seniors Championship. Of course Harry has long ago locked away an unbeatable lead in the Seniors Championship, but there is still interest in the podium finishers there. Michael was very pleased with Targe’s effort today because it knocked Blighty (does he have a first name?) down to second for the day for Seniors points, thereby helping Michael’s lead over Blighty for second place in the Seniors Championship.

Targe also led the field in respecting remembrance day and observing the minute’s silence at 11am, the eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month—pausing to remember those who have served and those who have died in all wars and peacekeeping operations. Thanks Targe for the reminder.

Blighty’s -3 and fourth place overall was matched by Adam, with Gordo “doing the SoS” and sneaking into 5th place overall with -4. Hopefully his punting at Flemington will be in plus territory.

The only player out of the points today was Andrew Noble who also managed the most birdies (2) with only 5 scored across the field for the day.

There was significant debate last week about what comes after “quadruple”. When Chris James hit his shot off the 4th, his new signature “knock down 9 iron” under the tree, the debate seemed academic, but it kept running a bit past the hole and despite various attempts to doctor the tape, the group kept getting 5.3 metres and therefore quintuple jackpot it is for next week!

Some consolation for Chris came on the 15th when another knock down 9 iron to about the same distance was enough to claim the ball. On the 18th, new member Tim, a workmate of the guy called Ryan, claimed the ball. Like Raj, Tim managed to make it to 100+ for the day but the rumour is he has plenty of room for improvement and like all new members, his early handicap may well be ridiculed when he starts playing for points. Welcome to the club Tim!

Next week it is a Priems Cup round. It’s a fun format and hopefully we’ll see a few more registrations than this week’s 10 players. The Priems brothers are warming up for the big day at Mansfield this weekend where it is reported that a few too many Friday night beers may have been a factor in the Saturday Mansfield stableford scores all being in the 20’s. Here’s betting both brothers score in the high 30’s or better next week as they battle it out as opposing captains.

Results for Saturday, 11 Nov 2023
1st Chris James (+1) 1st Rajesh Mahto (+1) 2nd Brendon Mitchell (-1) 2nd Ryan Porker (-1) 3rd Targe Mifsud (-2) 4th Andrew Blight (-3) 4th Adam King (-3) 5th Gordon Hill (-4)

Seniors Results: 1st Targe Mifsud (-2) 2nd Andrew Blight (-3) 3rd Gordon Hill (-4)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 4th Jackpot BallPin No 1 – 15th Chris James BallPin No 2 – 18th Tim (Guest) Surname NYK!