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Oodles of poodles on 15 February 2020.

Harry canoodles Noodles
Look, I’ve got two!

The weather men made forecasts of possible storms and lightning and this might have been enough to put some people off. The morning started out a bit on the gloomy side and drizzling rain and this might have been enough to put some people off. Or maybe there were better things on offer and that might have been enough to put some people off. But, there were thirteen members and Stan who were not put off their golf either by the weather forecasts, the actual weather or the prospect of a better offer. Yes, it did rain, on and off, and a bit of a downpour (relatively speaking) towards the end of the round meant that the 17th green did not have too many water-free areas. But, this did not stop some very nice scores (and corresponding handicap adjustments) being presented to the Captain.

A few members reckoned that Harry was a bit hard done by last week to be pipped from the top spot and when he presented as the early Club-house leader again today there was speculation as to whether it could happen again. There were rumours swirling around the course that Adam was demolishing the course yet again but, suddenly, out of the blue, Noodles turned in a card with a matching 40 points. So, there were two smiling faces on the top podium level today.

Just a single point behind on 39 points was Adam who turned after nine with 23 points. Was it the pressure or did the deterioration in the weather conditions contribute to the tapering off on the back nine. The low-light was a miss on the 16th which would have coincided with the worst of the rain. RodG also continues his recent run of form and was generally well in contention. A few hiccups in the short game didn’t help the cause.

Trevor was doing a bit of tossing up as whether to play before tee time but then decided to bite the bullet and give it a go. He is probably glad that he did because he managed to get together 35 points despite a shank that went at right angles between his legs and he had to do a quick-step to avoid interfering with the travel of the ball and a couple of three putt greens that could be heard a full fairway away. Targe also managed 35 points despite having his back-swing interfered with by Trev’s remonstrations. Porks picked up the last point of the day after fading a bit on the back nine. His tee shot on the 17th was last seen heading for the Yarra and is probably down by Dight’s Falls at this very moment.

The BallPins were on the 4th and 18th today and Noodles managed to snare both of them. Probably an early Birthday present as the Birthday Birdie has a visit to make next Saturday. The pin on the 18th was towards the back of the top deck and there were a number of reports of being close to the pin but just not on the green. At least Noodles wasn’t just on the front edge of the green like somebody was last week. The ProPin was a Jackpot on the 12th and once again nobody was able to get close enough to even try to put their name on the card so there will be a Double Jackpot next week.

Keith suffered from a case of the ‘lefts’ today and things finally came to a head when the ball headed OOB on the 13th. Keith didn’t even bother to look for it because he was ‘sick’ of it and its lefty tendencies. The pin on the 14th was located in a rather diabolical spot with steep slopes to contend with from which ever direction you approached it. Gordon was about 6m away and off the green, judging it to perfection when the ball stopped above the hole, turned at right angles and rolled into the hole for a birdie. This was one of just four that were reported for the day. Harry scored another on the 6th where he reckons he missed the eagle by less than a metre (as the ball went past the hole). Pretty much the same way he missed a hole-in-one by 75mm on the 4th on Thursday.

There were also a few less than stellar performances today. Somebody was heard to say that Pepsi played ‘like one of us’. Whitey had no luck with his putter today, not even off the tee. And, speaking of off the tee, Blighty lined up on the 1st and took an almighty swing and moved the ball an estimated 25mm. Then ensued a discussion as to whether Andrew was entitled to re-tee the ball with or without penalty. As in many cases, it depends. If the ball is within the teeing area (defined by the tee markers and the two club-length allowance) the following rule (6.2 b Teeing Area Rules Item 6) applies:

When Ball in Play Lies in Teeing Area. If the player’s ball in play is in the teeing area after a stroke (such as a teed ball after a stroke that missed the ball) or after taking relief, the player may:

  • Lift or move the ball without penalty (see Rule 9.4b, Exception 1), and
  • Play that ball or another ball from anywhere in the teeing area from a tee or the ground under (2), including playing the ball as it lies. 

Just a reminder that the AGM is coming up on 07 March. All Committee positions will spill and Treasurer, for one, is not renominating. Feel free to nominate for this or any other position that takes your fancy. Committeemen, activate your succession plan.

Also a reminder that the draw for the Matchplay Championship will be done after the round on 29 February. Everybody will be included unless you choose to opt out by registering your intent on the Registration Form on the web-site. As an alternative, you can notify Harry by email. If you remain in the draw then you are expected to abide by the rules particularly as they relate to arranging of matches and completion of rounds by the deadlines. We would prefer to avoid people missing out on gaining a place in the event because of subsequent walkovers.

Results for Saturday, 15 February 2020
1st Harry Boughen(40) 1st Stephen Butterfield(40) 2nd Adam King(39) 3rd Rod Grant(37) 4th Trevor Jackson(35) 4th Targe Mifsud(35) 5th Ryan Porker(34)

Seniors Results: 1st Harry Boughen (40) 2nd Rod Grant (37) 3rd Targe Mifsud (35) 3rd Trevor Jackson (35)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin12th Jackpot BallPin No 1 4th Stephen Butterfield BallPin No 2 18th Stephen Butterfield

Was it Senior’s Saturday on 08 February 2020?

A dam(n) fine effort!
Did I feel a draught?

With the high powered punters away for the weekend there were a few concerns that a quorum would be difficult to get to the tee. There was also a fair chance that any quorum that did turn up would be composed of a fair proportion of Seniors. As it turned out, eight of the thirteen members who turned out were of the Senior persuasion. We also had Peter’s mate Matt along for his second outing with us. Matt has signalled his intention to join us by submitting his Membership Application and, with one more round, and a paid up sub, he will be eligible for competition. The weather was mercifully kind and the rough was cut nice and short which is more than can be said for one of the courses on the Peninsula if the photo shown around at the after party was any guide.

As it turned out, one of the ‘youngsters’ spoiled the party for the oldies by coming in with a streets ahead personal best round of 82 off the stick and an eye-watering +7. In fact, Adam was +6 after seven holes and you could have been forgiven for thinking that the wheels might have fallen off when he managed a draughtie on the 8th. It took a few holes to recover his composure completely but he finished with +4 over the last seven holes. In the process, he also garnered the brand new one stroke penalty on his GA handicap for a ‘super’ round.

Harry started out looking as if he was going to alternate plus and minus for the whole round which is OK in the scheme of things. Something more was obviously required to have any chance and something more was delivered on the back nine. Except for a rather ‘nasty’ seven on the 13th where the shot from the bunker didn’t quite come off and the ball finished in the penalty area. Blighty thought that +5 would be enough to win but it was not to be.

Enzo continued to hit them straight and long and, in the process, caused his playing companions to claim that he really should be on a handicap of 12. Michael, on the other hand, who was claiming that he should be on 12, put the lie to that claim by joining Enzo on +1. Keith played his usual steady golf and squared pretty much everything to finish square for the day.

Blighty took one for the team today as he stood beside the 10th green. Peter was teeing off on the 11th and the shot went somewhat astray though, fortunately, without a great deal of speed and got Andrew squarely on the thigh. A session of thigh flashing after the round indicated that no significant damage had been done and the score did not suffer too greatly as a result. RodG was just a bit unlucky not to have done better with plenty of squares but just a few too many on the negative side of the ledger. Targe has been working hard at getting his handicap back down to where it should be and that could explain why he took an extra stroke on a hole where one was not due. Ken tried to lay claim for getting nearest the pin on the 16th green. The only problem was that he was teeing off from the 14th. Despite that, he managed to share fifth place with a score line of -1.

The first BallPin today was on the 4th and, according to the chit, Enzo beat Michael by 10cm but Blighty beat Enzo by heaps to take home the ball. The second BallPin on the 18th, and it was barely on the green to the pin well up on the back deck, went to Adam. The ProPin on the 12th went begging and will be a Jackpot to next week despite Keith marking a shot that was at least 7m from the hole. At least he didn’t measure it. Perhaps this general lack of accuracy explains why we managed only 3 birdies for the day.

After Blighty took his blow by the 10th green, he lined up on the 11th tee and went close to repeating Pete’s shot except that there were no players in range. Whitey was hopeful that he might have a reasonable round but a few things conspired to take that chance away. A shot that finished near the boundary fence on the 8th defied the best efforts to be found. From the 14th, a shot thought be be middling the 16th was nowhere to be seen. From the 15th, high wide and not so handsome vanished into the wilderness left of the green. And lastly, from the 16th, disappeared over the bike path to who knows where. Three balls in three holes and four for the round. Probably not a record but certainly some hurt pride.

At one stage it was thought that Targe had been lost from the group in front. Turns out he was just standing behind his buggy. With all of the punters away, it was commented as to how quiet (noise wise) the course was. However, the Birthday Birdie won’t be quiet this week. He has a big wish to pass on the Bob and Brent for their happy day. Also there is one for a bloke that we don’t see much of these days in the person of Ken Grist. Have a good one guys.

Results for Saturday, 08 February 2020
1st Adam King(+7) 2nd Harry Boughen(+5) 3rd Enzo Cirone(+1) 3rd Michael Gourlay(+1) 4th Keith Delzoppo(□) 5th Andrew Blight(-1) 5th Rod Grant(-1) 5th Targe Mifsud(-1) 5th Ken Watson(-1)

Seniors Results: 1st Harry Boughen (+5) 2nd Enzo Cirone (+1) 2nd Michael Gourlay (+1) 3rd Keith Delzoppo (□)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin12th Jackpot BallPin No 1 4th Andrew Blight BallPin No 2 18th Adam King

Red, white and green on 01 February 2020

Honest, I haven’t been running dead!

The weather reports promised just about everything – red dust and mud rain, white lightning and hail, and best of all, green grass underfoot. Well, it was pretty warm and the humidity made the place feel more like Darwin than downtown Melbourne. In the end, all the weather gods could do was to send down a few showers of rain and there was little evidence of the other forebodings. Except, of course for the green grass underfoot although it must be said that bitter experience showed that it was possible to find a pretty bare and bony lie. There seemed to be little reason, then, why 24 members and two guests should not be able to shoot the lights out and post some good scores.

However, the red, white and green did end up dominating the day when Enzo did a pretty good job of shooting the lights out to take out the February Monthly Medal with a very creditable net score of 61 from a gross of 81 strokes. This gross also fairly smashed his personal best, at least since he has been a member of the Club. The signs were really good from the get-go when Enzo drew gasps of admiration as he smashed it off the tee on the first. It was obviously not a flash in the pan as the only blemish on the card was a triple on the 8th.

Daniel, on the other hand, didn’t appear as if he was going to set the world on fire early on. He scored a dreaded draughtie on the 1st and an airie on the second but, from then on, there seemed to be little that he could do wrong. He, too, produced a personal best with his 88 off the stick and net 64. Bob was a bit unlucky, perhaps, to fall short of the red markers on the 3rd when his wayward drive caught a tree plumb and the ball rocketed back to finish just ahead of the blues. But, unperturbed, Bob kept his head down produced a score to share the podium with Daniel. According to reports, Chrispy pulled off a similar shot to Bob on the 3rd with pretty much the same result and certainly shy of the red markers.

The ‘come-back’ kid started out like he was really here and actually equalled par off the stick on the front nine. Although the wheels didn’t fall off on the back, there was a little less precision in the steering especially when it came to putting it into the hole and a six over total resulted in a net 66 for the round. Brendon managed a birdie on the 6th with a delicately executed chip in. He then blasted a 4 iron from the tee on the 7th to put the ball less than half a metre from the hole. An easy enough putt for consecutive birdies and a reasonable share of the 9 that were carded for the day. They also helped to claim a share of 3rd place.

Now, while we are on the subject of chips-in, it has to be reported that Gordon shanked his tee shot from the 18th and then put his second to the bank behind the green with the pin placed on the bottom deck just below the finish of the slope. The playing companions said – best of luck with that!. Wouldn’t you know it but the ball ran across the top deck, hesitated at the brow before continuing down the slope to deposit itself ever so gently into the hole. This ‘shot of the century’ scored Gordon 4th place on his own. Blighty came into the club house looking a bit like a freshly beached water rat as the last group negotiated the 18th in the midst of a bit of a downpour. And, if it hadn’t been for a double on that last hole, Andrew might easily have placed better than fifth.

Now, it was reported that Brendon put his drive on the 7th to within half a metre of the pin. He was probably so disappointed that there was no Nearest the Pin on that particular hole that he just had to go and get his name on the two BallPin holes at the 12th and the 18th. The ProPin was a double JackPot on the 15th and there were probably a few bids for sharing of the spoils. There was certainly a fair bit of elbowing to get the nearest position to the pin but, in the end, it was Porks who made the grade with a shot to 2.7m. It was not reported whether he pocketed the lot or whether the largesse was shared about.

Rob and MattH played their first ‘match’ of the year today and Rob came out victorious. Chrispy reckons that Rob should stay away when Matt plays for the rest of the year to have any chance of holding his lead. Ah, brotherly love! The Beast did not have a great day today and he was wondering how it was possible for two players to have five fat ladies between them on the one day. He was at pains to point out that his absence over the next few weeks is down to pre-planned travel and not the sulks.

Stan joined us again today and put in another card. Peter also brought along a friend of his, Matthew Aforozis. His card today had a few rough holes but also a fair sprinkling of good ones. Pete reckons some of it is down to luck after an approach to the 13th bounced on the path and then ran down the hill to finish a couple of metres from the hole. Don’t worry Matt, skillful shots will always make somebody jealous.

Rob apparently took his life in his hands today by chatting away while Damo was on the tee at the 17th. The year of living dangerously! Targe was upset about missing a shortish putt on the 13th and let go of the implement in his hands which fell to the ground and displaced the ball. Now, according to the rules, the ball should have been replaced to the spot from which it was moved with no penalty. However, because the ball was not replaced to the spot and played from where it came to rest, a one stroke penalty applies.

You could almost be forgiven for thinking that we should have a reverse Eclectic where you only take account of your worst holes and the highest score wins. In that case, Noodles would be right up there, as well as in the regular Eclectic, with his 12 on the 3rd. The number of OOBs tallied at least 3. And Noodles was talking about how some people had no common sense after Porks recovered a ball for him, carefully cleaned and dried it and then rolled it along the ground to return it.

Don’t forget, next Monthly Medal day (7th March) is also our AGM. I don’t think the Secretary has been inundated with Nominations for Committee yet but please do consider taking on a role to keep the Club running the way you would like it to be run. Don’t be backward in coming forward as all positions will spill and will be open to all comers.

This day will also be the start of our Matchplay Championship event for the year. The Matchplay Registration form will be opened for you to register your interest or otherwise in being included in the draw. Everybody will be included unless you indicate otherwise. The draw will be published after play on 29 February.

Results for Saturday, 01 February 2020
1st Enzo Cirone(61) 2nd Bob McDonald(64) 2nd Daniel O’Rourke(64) 3rd Damien Lee(66) 3rd Brendon Mitchell(66) 4th Gordon Hill(67) 5th Andrew Blight(68)

Seniors Results: 1st Enzo Cirone (61) 2nd Bob McDonald (64) 3rd Gordon Hill (67)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin15th Ryan Porker BallPin No 1 12th Brendon Mitchell BallPin No 2 18th Brendon Mitchell

Pork barreling has been rampant on 25 January 2020.

Porks is all thumbs (up)!
I was a dark horse, but now I’m light!

The course had a bit of a top-dressing the other night. The north wind raised some dust from the Mallee and carried it down south where it met up with an approaching front being fed with some moisture from the tropics. The resulting downpour was more the consistency of mud than rain and the whole of Melbourne had a rather streaky reddish tinge the next day. It certainly didn’t do the course any harm and eighteen members turned out to take their chances before the kids go back to school and the work year gets going in earnest. We also had Stan Blackshaw along as an extra and, despite playing in a group with Noodles, it seems that there is some chance that he will come back and join our merry band. According to reports, Stan’s GA handicap does not look like stan(ding) for too long.

Another bloke whose handicap has been heading south in recent times lined up as today’s winner. Porks was in a position on the 18th to better his PB by two strokes. Unfortunately, something seems to have distracted him and, after putting his ball close enough to take out the BallPin, he took three putts to only add two points to the 39 that he had scored up until that time. The stroke total of 72 was just one outside his previous best, both of which have been scored in the last six months or so. The points popped him back to the top of the Championship Table. Can he go back to back?

The break from the rough and tumble of grade cricket must be doing Whitey some good or the more regular play is having a beneficial effect. He was able to string together a pair of nineteens today to gather himself a spot on the second podium level albeit with a bit of a cut to the handicap as well as the points. Enzo seems to have found his mojo and continued his form from last week which is a bit of a contrast to what we have seen in recent times. The driver was doing a top job except for one errant shot on the 13th that went high and wide, never to be seen again. Except for that, and a number of putts left hanging on the lip of the hole, there could have been a completely different story to tell.

Harry started off well but let he his guard slip a bit in the latter stages of the front nine and managed to catch a share of fourth place with a tally of 34 points. Noodles, on the other hand, found it difficult to get more than two good scores in a row. When he did score, he scored well and joined Harry on 34. Matt, who was humourously announced as Mike in the call of the card, scored well in the first half but did fade a bit on the run home. Damo was back on deck after a long break and he made sure that everybody knew just how long it had been. His pleas for a handicap review pretty much fell on deaf ears so he went out and proved that he probably won’t need one. In the process, he missed raiding the Eagle’s Nest by millimetres after putting his drive onto the 17th green and leaving the putt tantalisingly close. He got the birdie though and played a part in getting us to the tally of 12 for the day. SOS joined Damo in fifth place and left a fair scattering of missed chances out there in the process.

Blighty ploughs the field.
That is what you call a very fine divot!

The first BallPin was on the 12th and the only name on the chit belonged to Blighty. Now, while we are on the topic of Blighty, it should be mentioned that he sank a good 10m putt on the 16th and indulged in such a celebratory dance that his playing companions were proposing a new trophy category to acknowledge such performances. Whether the rush of blood continued to the next tee can only be conjectured. But, there was witnessed one of the finest ‘groundies’ in many a long day. Even the very fine divot cleared the ball which remained firmly attached to its tee. The very Pinnacle of a tee shot.

But, Blighty was not alone. Ken had a couple of weeks off and he reckons it was because his balls were suffering from kencussion. He showed why on the first though there is some argument about whether it was actually a draughtie as the ball could not be found. However, undaunted, he made an undisputed one later in the round. Dennis joined Ken, both in the playing group and on the draughtie list. Damo was spotted playing his second on the 12th just on the wrong side of the red markers as well. And, while not strictly in the category, Stef played a provisional from the 17th after his first shot disappeared into no-man’s-land beyond the fairway. Talk about a super-shank. If the ball had not caught the trees behind the 9th green, it could easily have finished somewhere about the 10th tee.

Dennis managed the t(r)ee marshal job this morning and was running about asking people if they had paid their sub as he was five dollars short. Wouldn’t you know it, but it was Dennis who hadn’t tipped in. The money wasn’t needed for the ProPin on the 15th today as it went to Jackpot once again. Keith has his kids to thank for a new driver that they chipped in for as a Christmas gift. Keith was pretty pleased with the performance of the driver but it seems that it might have had an adverse effect on the rest of his game.

And, while we are on the topic of Keith, the Birthday Birdie owes him a big apology for overlooking him for a good wish last week. And the same goes for Jason, who just happens to share the date with Keith.

Results for Saturday, 25 January 2020
1st Ryan Porker(41) 2nd Rodney White(38) 3rd Enzo Cirone(35) 4th Harry Boughen(34) 4th Stephen Butterfield(34) 4th Matt Hunt(34) 5th Damien Lee(33) 5th Stephen O’Sullivan(33)

Seniors Results: 1st Enzo Cirone (35) 2nd Harry Boughen (34) 3rd Andrew Blight (32) 3rd Gordon Hill (32)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin15th Jackpot BallPin No 1 12th Andrew Blight BallPin No 2 18th Ryan Porker