Category Archives: Club News

Despite the conclusion that you might be forgiven for drawing from the featured photo, the day started off quite warm although there was a bit of wind to make things interesting.  The members were very happy to see that the ground-staff had been out on the job early again and that the greens had been freshly mowed.

A threat of some rain held off at least until the round was over and so an enjoyable day was had by all if the banter around the tables was any guide.  The prospect of extra points in a par event seems to have lifted the general mood and the person to lay claim to the first two pointer was Gordon who managed a birdie on the very first hole.  It will be interesting to see who can bring home the first three pointer.

Brendon seems to have hit a bit of a streak and he has now made a break to the front of the pack in the Championship Table.  He obviously likes the Par style of play as his two wins have been in that format.  How much of today’s plus six scoreline was down to the extra points has not been divulged.

Porks certainly took advantage of the extra points by gathering a couple on consecutive holes at the 3rd and 4th and in the process saved himself from further outward drift of his handicap.  His card of plus four was well and truly matched by Gordo who has already been mentioned in despatches.

DennisW managed to present with a card that was also in positive territory to snag third place on the podium.  Dennis conducted a master class in play from tee to green but, unfortunately, the flat stick let him down a little and the result could have been entirely different if a few more of the rolls had dropped.

Simon played an exemplary second shot into the 3rd green and the ball finished under half a metre from the hole.  Simon removed his hat to take a bow except that his hat was not on his head but quite a distance back along the fairway.  Maybe the chemicals from his ‘puffer’ or the lack of tar from the ‘darts’ have addled his brain.  Michael obligingly jogged back to retrieve the hat while Ed rolled about laughing at Michael’s running style.  Mal has kept up his run of form since his return and also produced a square card to finish alongside Si.

Rob (the good looking one) was just a stroke behind with minus one.  As well as his point for fifth place, Rob managed to collect a ball by putting it close enough on the BallPin 4th hole.  The 12th was a double jackpot ProPin pool this week and this could very well be the reason that Michael made a come-back from his back injury as he was able to put it to 2.4m.  In the process he just managed to squeeze out Brendon at 2.5m with Gordon and Porks also thinking they had some sort of a chance.  Brendon made up for his disappointment by sneaking in to just under the 5m limit (4.51m) from the rather difficult top tier pin placement on the 18th to take out the second ProPin.

Michael’s return to play started well with several birdies and it obviously continued at least until the 12th.  However the loot counting might have distracted him because it was all down hill from there and a couple of three putt greens on the 14th and 15th caused some serious muttering under the breath and a determination to consult with the sports psychologist once again.

Michael was not alone in the psychology stakes.  MattH might or might not have been distracted by a worm popping its head out of the ground when he duffed a chip.  Whatever the case he seems to have taken it out on the worm population if the picture of the result is any guide.  Noodles also apparently went very close to breaking his New Year resolution but the proximity of a playing partner seems to have saved the day.

MattN might have caught a bad case of the Chrispy’s (aka shanks).  His second from the centre of the 1st finished in the middle of the 10th.  Not to be outdone, his second on the 2nd, from the centre of the fairway, finished OOB.  And so it continued for the rest of the round.  SOS started off well with a plus on the first and a good laugh at Matt’s shank.  But then karma took over and SOS managed to score minus on 13 of the next 17 holes.  Needless to say, the final score-line did not look pretty.  Targe had a bit of a tricky down-hill putt, obviously on one of the sloped greens.  The ball was heading so far past the hole that Targe ran after as fast as his legs would carry and managed to stop the ball.  The ensuing penalties ensured a negative score on the hole.

The Matchplay seeding has been done and the draw is out.  Please check it out and remind yourself of the rules.  You have until the April MM to complete your first round match.  If, for any reason, you are unable to play within that time frame please defer to the reserves in the order that they appear at the bottom of the table.  And remember, no result by the deadline, both players are eliminated.

As notified previously, because of the unavoidable absence of the President, the AGM of the Club has been postponed for one week to 10 March.

Results for Saturday, 24 February 2018
1st Brendon Mitchell(+6) 2nd Gordon Hill(+4) 2nd Ryan Porker(+4) 3rd Dennis Ward(+1) 4th Malcolm Fleming(□) 4th Simon Powell(□) 5th Robert Priems(-1)

Seniors Results: 1st Gordon Hill (4) 2nd Dennis Ward (1) 3rd Malcolm Fleming (0) 3rd Simon Powell (0)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin No 1 12th Michael Gourlay ProPin No 2 18th Brendon Mitchell BallPin 4th Robert Priems

The weather could not have been kinder to the twenty-one members and one guest who took to the field today.  The staff had been up at sparrow’s and the greens were freshly mowed so there were few excuses to be had for not scoring low though, it must be said, there were a few low scores returned.  Now, before you get your backwards all forwards, the competition today was Stableford and so low scores get high scores and vice versa.  If that makes sense.

So, it is a bit grim when a member hands in a card on which he played to his handicap for him to be told sorry, that doesn’t get a point.  And, one of the reasons for that was that el Presidente, JohnQ, beat his personal best by five strokes and coasted home with a total of 46 points to leave most of the rest of the field in his dust.  Chrispy reckoned he was getting RSI from having to write threes on the card so John very kindly scored a four pointer on the 17th to give him some relief.  What made it worse for Chris was the fact that his sump plug had fallen out completely and he was putting gashes on his own side of the card (some of the time, anyway).

Dale also had a round of doing nothing much wrong and he was Clubhouse leader for a little while.  He was noticed to heave something of a sigh of relief when news of John landed so that he wouldn’t get the winners penalty even if there were a few less points as a result.  Dennis had also been Clubhouse leader for some time (he was in the first group) and his result could have been somewhat better with a total of four lost balls for the round.  Two on the 13th when his tee shot finished in the right hand hazard.  His penalty shot over the hazard and trees went so well that it finished in the hazard on the other side of the fairway which resulted in a casual walk to the green.

CraigC made a bit of a come-back today and showed that a break from the course hadn’t done him any harm though he did admit to having played around a bit – I mean having played a few rounds.  Mal filled out the fifth position with a small break of his new handicap and showed that there is life in the old dog yet.  And the result could have been even better if he hadn’t had a run in with three trees on the one fairway (well not exactly ‘on’ the fairway) and a couple of other little aberrations.

There was a Jackpot ProPin on the 12th from last week and the pin was tucked into the far right corner of the green (again).  As a result, nobody got within the required 5m distance and so there will be a Double Jackpot next week.  Actually, somebody did get within 5m, but Porks couldn’t claim the pool because he wasn’t on the green.  He did get the birdie though and in the process he contributed to the total of 19 for the day, which is a pretty respectable total.  The BallPin was on the 15th and there was a bit of a contest that was won by Brent.  The ProPin on the 18th was even more fiercely contested.  In the first group, Simon eased out Dennis by a margin that varies from a few millimetres to a few inches depending on who you listen to.  But the prize went to Craig who managed to put it to 40cm.

The Birthday Birdie has a small job to do this week and he will be hunting down Noodles later in the week to make sure that he has a swiping good time for his special day.

Targe has been getting pretty familiar with the pumping system beside the 9th fairway.  His drive from the 1st was just by the pump-house while that from the 9th ended in the enclosure around the valve set.  When said drive looked as if it might have finished under the big deciduous tree on the left side, Ed reckoned that there was enough room for a full swing under there (even more so for Targe!)

Brendon didn’t have much of a day, even his playing companions felt sorry for him.  On one hole, he had his ball ‘stolen’ with a far inferior ball left in its place.  On another hole, as he lined up his putter behind the ball he touched it and it moved although, apparently, Brendon was the only one who noticed.  Plus he also had lots of problems with trees interfering with the flight of his ball..  As Chrispy said, it wasn’t a day for ‘good’ golfers.  Perhaps that is why Chris could be heard proclaiming his displeasure from one end of the course to the other.

Bob also had a few words to say and there is a move afoot to count the blasphemies to see whether he uses more than he takes strokes.  Another person who perhaps had a reason to swear, but there are no reports as to whether he did or not, was Jason, who left a putt about 50mm from the hole, and who went to ‘tap’ it in whereupon the ball did not move from its spot.

Next week will be our first GrandPar event for the year.  They are scheduled for any month when there are two ‘Club” Par rounds in a month.  The idea is that, if you win a hole without using all of your strokes you score extra points for the remaining strokes.  So, if you have a stroke on a hole and you birdie the hole you score +2.  This will require some concentration, particularly if you are playing inside as well as that will be a standard Par event and so it is possible that your scores will be different.

The AGM is scheduled for the week after.  If you have a hankering to be involved in the management of the Club you can nominate for any position on the Committee by downloading and printing a nomination form from the website (under Forms on the side-bar) and strong-arming a couple of your mates to nominate and second your nomination.  Any current Committee member who is planning to stand down it would be handy if you could persuade a replacement to stand or at least let the President or Secretary know of your intentions.

After next week’s round, the seeding for the Matchplay will be done in preparation for the start of the event the week after.  If you do not want to be included in the seeding for any reason, please advise by using the Registration Form as soon as possible so that the draw is as ‘clean’ as possible and all contestants intend to abide by the Rules of the competition.  The most important one is that, if a pairing have not played or advised an agreed result by the end of play on the closing date of the round, both contestants will be eliminated.  Please talk to each other.  Phone numbers and emails are on the Contacts/Member Directory.  As a hint, the security question still includes the sand trap that used to be on the 1st fairway.

Results for Saturday, 17 February 2018
1st John Quinlan(46) 2nd Dale Webb(44) 3rd Dennis Ward(40) 4th Craig Cameron(38) 5th Malcolm Fleming(37)

Seniors Results: 1st Dennis Ward (40) 2nd Craig Cameron (38) 3rd Malcolm Fleming (37)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin No 1 12th Jackpot ProPin No 2 18th Craig Cameron BallPin 15th Brent Rowley

There were no reported draughties today and Noodles’ new year resolution is still going strong, although his playing partner MattH may have lost a club in anger. He blamed the dewy conditions early on. MattN caught a bad case of the shanks early after being mostly flawless off the tee (according to Matt himself). Playing with Chrispy appears to be dangerous as Sos was reported to have caught the shanks a couple of weeks earlier. Pepsi didn’t have the greatest day on the field and was heard carrying on with expletives for most of the day after mostly missing putts.

Results for Saturday, 10 February 2018
1st Bob McDonald(+4) 1st Brendon Mitchell(+4) 2nd Chris Priems(+2) 3rd Andrew Blight(+1) 3rd Ryan Porker(+1) 4th Allan Davies(□) 4th Dennis Ward(□) 5th Dale Webb(-1)

Seniors Results: 1st Bob McDonald (+4) 2nd Andrew Blight (+1) 3rd Allan Davies (□) 3rd Dennis Ward (□)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin No 1 12th Jackpot ProPin No 2 18th Stephen Butterfield BallPin 4th Matt Hunt

The humidity was so high you could almost cut the air with a knife.  And, as the fog and low cloud cleared away, the sun really began to bite and by the end of the round some players were struggling to make it up the last hill to the 18th green.  Chrispy could probably blame the after effects of his Australia Day celebrations.  Mal and Rod probably put it down to advancing age while Darklands Dennis was just relieved that the cricket and soccer are out of the way and the footy hasn’t started (yet) giving him a chance to get out for a game or two.  As for the other thirteen members who braved the conditions, or didn’t go away for the long weekend, they just grinned and bore it in the hope of playing some reasonable golf.

And, obviously, there was no reason not to play good golf if the score-lines that came in are any guide.  Noodles’ new year resolution still holds good although it seems that a series of three putt greens on the front nine required a bit of teeth clenching to maintain the focus on the job in hand.  The grip seems to have relaxed on the back nine and the putts began to fall and the score began to mount as the result of a ten stroke differential between the two halves.  In the end, a total of 42 points was enough to take the day though Noodles did express the view that 50 was a possibility if the flat stick had worked on the front.

On the other hand, John went gang-busters on the front nine and looked set to continue the blitz on the back but a bit of a wobble set in from the 14th to the 16th where three singletons took just a little of the shine off a bottom line of 41 points.  John had been going point for point with Jason as they agonised over who could least afford to win and take the winner’s penalty.  As it turned out the banter was all for naught and Noodles took the blow on their behalf.  Darklands was also wishing for somebody to come in and take first place so that he would avoid the penalty.  He got his wish but dropped more points because of his relegation to third place.

Jason has been working hard at his game with practice and games during the week and his dedication continues to pay off with another round that ended up delivering just a little less than it promised.  Matt H played a very consistent hand with 19 points on each half and he too bemoaned a few chances left out there.  Harry got three birdies today although only two of them would count to the Eclectic because one of them was of the actual feathered variety.  No wildlife was actually injured though and the total count for the birdies that mattered was 14.

SOS, by his own admission, hasn’t really been in the race of recent times and so he was pretty pleased to both play to his handicap and to score his first point for this competition year.  There were a few holes with room for improvement and so it might be that we see more of SOS on or about the podium in weeks to come.  Just out of the main points, but sneaking in for another point in the Senior’s Championship, was Simon who seems pretty pleased with his front running at this stage of the year.

The BallPin today was on the 4th and once again, somebody in the first group put it close and shut the rest of the field out.  The man of the moment to collect a ball was Mal who tried valiantly to follow a pretty speccy round on Thursday but he might just have wilted a little in the heat.  The mobile ProPin was on the 12th and Chrispy was able to keep his head down enough to put his ball to 4.5m and collect the cash on offer.  The ProPin on the 18th needed a shot to the top shelf and, as has been often the case, the target eluded the field and so there will be a Double Jackpot Pool up for grabs next week.

While on the subject of Chrispy, his backside has been a-peeling but it’s certainly not appealing.  After a particularly unsatisfying second hole, he knocked his ball into the cup and couldn’t be bothered (or wasn’t able) to bend down to pick it out and so a rather bemused following group speculated, remarkably correctly as it turned out, as to what had happened.  SteveK did try to claim that it was actually his ball that had gone into the hole without anyone noticing but that did not explain the ‘extra’ ball on the green that he was standing next to at the time.

Harry was bent down teeing his ball on the 15th when a call of ‘Fore’ came from the 14th.  Rather than move and make a larger target, Harry stayed put and the ball landed a metre or so away and bounced harmlessly over head and ran down the hill and settled in a puddle on the path.  Rob arrived, full of apologies and was searching for his ball on the tee box but had to have it pointed out that he had parked his buggy almost on top of the ball and that he must have just about stepped on it in the process.  Maybe something was distracting Rob because he scored the wrong person on the card for about five holes.  Fortunately, the error was discovered in time, and he had been using a pencil, so an eraser was all that was needed.  Pepsi wasn’t quite so lucky in avoiding a errant ball and took a rap on the ankle at the practice green after Steve ‘shanked’ a chip.  Shankfully, Chrispy was virtually shank free although he did own to a couple and Rod reckons he caught the disease from Chris.

Dale had a round of ups and downs but not necessarily the usual golfing variety.  One of the ‘downs’ was on the 15th when he sprayed his drive into the shrubbery and it bounced off a tree out into knee-deep kikuyu.  He left his bag after a brief search and went back to the tee to re-load.  A low vicious slice was saved from a similar fate in the long grass by hitting his bag dead centre.  That put paid to any scoring hope on that hole.  However, one of his ‘ups’ came shortly after on the 17th when his attempt to drive to the green strayed across onto the 18th.  He then lobbed it up over the trees and the chain-wire fence to a metre and a half from the hole and sank the putt for what turned out to be a pretty simple birdie and probably the ‘up and down’ of the round.

There are still one or two people who have not paid their subscription for this year so, if it has slipped your mind, it would be nice to get it fixed up as soon as possible.  Just a quick bank transfer into the Club account is all that is required.  And, just in case you don’t know, the Club sub is $30 and, if you have GolfLink with us, the total is $120.

The Matchplay Registration Form is open so if you do not want to be seeded for this event can you please indicate your intention by using the form.  Remember, if you are seeded, you have an obligation to play in the event and to abide by the rules that are posted under the Club Rules menu item.

Results for Saturday, 27 January 2018
1st Stephen Butterfield(42) 2nd John Quinlan(41) 3rd Dennis Tiernan(39) 4th Harry Boughen(38) 4th Jason Hopkins(38) 4th Matt Hunt(38) 5th Stephen O’Sullivan(36)

Seniors Results: 1st Dennis Tiernan (39) 2nd Harry Boughen (38) 3rd Simon Powell (34)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin No 1 12th Chris Priems ProPin No 2 18th Jackpot BallPin 4th Malcolm Fleming