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The whole Club was on ice for the July Monthly Medal on 01 July 2017

Dennis anyone?
Robotic surgery does wonders for your game!

A couple of weeks ago, the Club was delighted to spot a number of the extremely rare cah-cah birds shuffling around the first tee as we waited to hit off.  Well today it was the even rarer oohma bird.  For those not into ornithology, this is another bird that lives in the Antarctic but it has absolutely no legs.  And every time it comes to land on the ice it can be heard giving out its characteristic cry – oohma doodle, oohma doodle.

Help I'm frozen to the ground.
SOS chatting up a bird.

An example of one such bird was captured out on the course being chatted up by one of our hardy band of of shorts wearing members though there was some discussion as to whether it really was an oohma, the characteristic call not having been heard, or whether its tiny feet were just frozen to the ground.  Keith was not responsible for the apparent dazed condition of the bird.  Needless to say, it was pretty icy out there and quite a few topped shots were blamed on the fact that players were carrying an extra inch of ice on the soles of their shoes.  The area around the pin on the second was giving a very good impression of the surface of the moon with the multitude of craters from iced up sprigs.

There was also a bit of fog about for a while but not one of our twenty-one players managed to get lost although there were a couple of early withdrawals.  Steve reckoned he was coming down with something but managed to make it to the 9th before pulling the pin and heading for somewhere warmer.  Dave, on the other hand looked as if he was going to come up with something and his playing companions assessed him as being a ‘lighter shade of pale’ before he too headed off to put his head down.  Just what he was going to put it down was not specified.  Something he drank the night before was a likely cause.  So, with two down there were only nineteen left to finish off the round to decide the July Medal.  At this point, the Birthday Birdie would like to mention that this week sees a significant milestone for Pepsi on the anniversary front and today’s celebrations are just a few days early of the mark.  Happy Birthday Pepsi.  But, just imagine how many players we would have had were it not for the big bash today.

Dennis wasn’t one hundred percent happy with his game despite being assured that he wasn’t going too badly and was in with a chance.  As the back nine progressed, his swing found its groove and the club really started to make contact with the ball.  So much so, that on the 15th, the ball almost ended in the car-park so it was somewhat off line.  Targe reported its position but it turned to be too hard to find.  On the 17th, the drive was right in the Lord Mayor’s Office and the chip was right on line but pulled up just a bit short.  The birdie was a welcome result. It contributed to another paltry total of five for the field and won the event with a nett card of 69.

A par there would have resulted in a three way tie with the Beast and Dale who both had their moments with quadruple bogies on their cards.  As it turned out, Dennis would still have won on a count-back.  Bill could easily have been much further down the field as he hit three balls from the tee on the 14th.  Fortunately for Bill, he found the first and proceeded to get his par for the hole.  Michael was heard to be less than happy with at least one of his tee shots but in true Michael style he was still able to put together a pretty good round and came in 3rd spot with his nett 71 from a 74 off the stick.  He was joined by Brendon who was spotted almost lying prone in the middle of the 16th trying to get a sight on the pin of the 14th with his laser range-finder.  Gordon also shared this podium spot after thrilling the crowd with a monster putt for birdie on the 1st, only to let them down when he missed a tiddler on the 18th.  Gordon is a bit of a numbers man and he was all excited about the significance of today’s date and the fact that if you wrote it a certain way it read the same backwards and forwards, which could go some way to explaining the hash he made of writing the date on the top of the results sheet.

Targe (popularly known as Yours Truly) scored himself the 4th place spot on his own with a very steady 72 nett.  Craig reckons he could have played better if it hadn’t taken at least six holes to start thawing out and to stop wearing elevator shoes.  Bob started out a bit on the average side but his game did pick up and he opined that he had not had a whinge all day.  A contra view was that he was actually crying.  Still, a point is a point, and Bob is still the man to catch.  When Bob handed his card in, Targe and others did a double-take as the score written in the result block showed nett 23.  Noodles swears that it was a seven but the only explanation can be that he had a severe case of the hiccups at the time that he wrote it.

After a serious run of Jackpots on the Nearest the Pin competitions over the last month, everyone was on tenterhooks as to whether the run would continue today.  But, it was not to be though there were a few groups through before a name was penned.  The BallPin was on the 15th and Gordo got it not all that close but obviously close enough.  Harry’s was exactly pin high and probably closer but it was his second shot after a stray went OOB.  The ProPin on the 12th only just went off with Simon putting his to 4.52m which was, according to Simon, the highlight of his day.  Only seventeen more to go Si!  The ProPin on the 18th was another one that Harry was exactly pin high to, just not on the green.  That job was left up to Porks who collected the dosh with 2.29m.

And, while on the topic of Noodles, he achieved something today that few others in the club have and had a par on the 2nd from the back blocks.  His drive wasn’t all that great, his second was OK, but the third was a bottler and put the ball almost to gimme distance.  Just goes to show that you chip and putt for dough.  And still on the subject of Noodles and his putting it seems that he is experimenting with different styles to try to improve his performance (putting, that is).  He has worked through conventional, baseball, claw, Wie claw and so forth.  The most successful might have him buying one of the cut-down kids putters though he thinks he might not be able to stand after playing a round putting bent double.

Ed and Michael played in the same group today and marked each other’s cards.  Now Michael has been known to leave it for a hole or two before ‘catching up’ and it seems that Ed’s short term memory went out the window with his teeth.  As a result there was quite a bit of discussion between them about scores and the card marked by Ed was messier than normal.  On the 8th, Michael estimated that Ed’s approach shot was probably on a fairway over at Greenacres but Ed insisted on searching for it while the rest of the group putted out.  By the time that they persuaded Ed out of the jungle and he finished off his 8 strokes for the hole they were about two holes behind and never really caught up.

There was only one draughtie reported today and that was down to Trevor once again.  Not sure which hole it was on but today was not one of Trev’s best.  But, hang in there Trev, one in twenty is a good one (just ask Simon).  Allan has formed a view that deafness can cause heart attacks.  It’s not that he has gone deaf or anything though his dog has and he reckons it just about has a heart attack if you surprise it when it is not looking.

Winter Cup coming up the week after next so this is a big chance for someone to catch Bob (unless, of course, he wins it).  And, yes, it is Par next week but that is no excuse not to come along.  After that, you can revel in three weeks of Stableford.

Results for Saturday, 01 July 2017
1st Dennis Ward(69) 2nd Bill Eastoe(70) 2nd Dale Webb(70) 3rd Michael Gourlay(71) 3rd Gordon Hill(71) 3rd Brendon Mitchell(71) 4th Targe Mifsud(72) 5th Craig Cameron(73) 5th Bob McDonald(73)

Seniors Results: 1st Dennis Ward (69) 2nd Bill Eastoe (70) 3rd Gordon Hill (71)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin No 1 12th Simon Powell ProPin No 2 18th Ryan Porker BallPin 15th Gordon Hill