Category Archives: Club News

Some days are diamonds somebody once said, or sang, or something.  And if you had to nominate a diamond day, today would have to have been one of the front runners.  A fairly mild night meant it didn’t take long for the blood to get circulating and a bit of over-cast kept the sun out of your eyes for most of the round.  The dearth of rain continues and the course just gets runnier and runnier and even the worm burners don’t finish too badly.  The staff have seen fit to spread some more sand/fertiliser on the greens (at least some of them) and so things should be in really good shape for our major event, the Stuart Clarke Memorial, over the next two weeks.  There’s a fair chance that the fields will be bigger than the seventeen souls that made it to the tees today even though some of them were cutting it a bit fine and nicely mucked up the groupings so carefully worked out by Chrispy.  The money was proving a bit problematic until SOS got out his calculator and Targe owned up that he hadn’t yet paid his comp fee.

The one person who will be able to rate today as a diamond was Damo who putted for birdies on the first four holes and got none of them.  On the fifth, he by-passed the putting altogether and chipped in to get the first of his three birdies for the day.  The fact that he only got three indicates that he was only bogie on two occasions to bring in a card of 67 off the stick and a pretty darn impressive 44 points (22 points out and back).  He did admit to getting a bit twitchy on the last four or five holes as he could see a personal best looming and he desperately wanted to break the 70 barrier that had stopped him numerous times since reaching it way back in 2009.  A three stroke break suggests it might be another while before it falls again, but who knows!

Now, Ryan was playing in the same group as Damo and they hit it out, blow for blow, even to the extent of both chipping in for birdie on the 5th.  They turned neck and neck and up to the 12th there was only a nostril in it but a couple of hiccups on the next two holes opened up the margin and Ryan had to settle for second place with his forty pointer.  For some reason, 22 points on the front nine was the score to have today as Chrispy managed to achieve the same total on the way out but he too managed a few average holes on the way back and also finished up with 40 points as well.

The next bloke would have to count himself lucky to be in the points.  First off, he arrived at the course without his buggy battery after assuring Chrispy on pick-up that he had everything.  Chrispy was kind enough to lend him his car to dash home to collect it.  Then, during the round he lost the remote controller unit for said electric buggy and to top things off he also lost his laser range-finder.  Interestingly, the loss of the latter did not seem to have affected his game too much as he managed to come home with a total of 38 points.  SOS called in the sniffer dogs and with a bit of detective work the lost controller was eventually found half way down the 10th fairway (in the trees).  Not sure how it wasn’t missed until the 13th but that’s probably another story altogether.

Jason has been out practicing a bit during the week and his handicap has been sneaking down over the last few weeks so it is perhaps not surprising that he gave himself a stroke on the second which meant that he came back to 4th place alongside DennisT with 37 points.  Dennis apparently gave himself a night off at the Darklands last night as he couldn’t bring himself to sit through a Justin Bieber gig even if he was being paid for it.  Eddie filled the last points spot with a score of 35 points.

There were a fair swag of birdies today with a total of seventeen which kind of works out at one birdie per person which is kind of nice.  There were quite a few movements on the Eclectic table today but that was mainly down to people with only a couple of cards in this year.  Bob still has a handy lead in the event but it only takes a couple of strategically placed birdies to wipe that out.  There is a three way tie at the top of the Championship Table at the moment with quite a number only a few points behind so there is plenty of potential for the pecking order to change in the next few weeks with our next major, the Stuart Clarke Memorial, being played over the next two weeks.  And don’t forget it is whacky shirt day for the second round.

As presaged last week, there are now two ProPins up for grabs each week (but no Double Dollars of Medal days).  ProPin No 1 was on the 12th and nobody was able to get close enough to get their name on the card and so that will be a Jackpot for next week.  ProPin No 2 was on the 18th and there were a couple of contenders but in the end, the prize went to CraigC who finished 2.35m from the hole to take out the dosh.  The BallPin was on the 4th and Damo put his shot about pin high and maybe 3m from the hole.  But, as part of the Damo/Ryan contest, Ryan sailed his out over the trees and brought it in nicely to finish about 2.5m away to collect himself a ball for his efforts.

The first round of the Matchplay got under way today and there were four matches decided.  Harry and Noodles met again with Noodles still smarting over his defeat in last year’s event.  Harry struggled a bit off the tee early on and gave Noodles an early jump and the momentum never really swung the other way until the match finished after the 15th, 4 and 3 to Noodles.  Craig and Andrew played a close run thing after Craig got an early start that Andrew managed to counter and the score card said square for most of the rest of the round.  With a shot up his sleeve on the last, Andrew had a good change to take the match but he was let down by a less than spectacular tee shot while Craig put his on for his ProPin winning effort and took out the match 1 up.  With Brendon losing all his gear, if not his marbles, it might have been expected that Targe would have been able to win this match.  Not to be however as Brendon romped it home 4 and 2.  The other match was Ed and SOS.  It’ s a bit hard to tell how it went because Ed kept the scores in his head and who knows how you’d find them there.  Anyway, the upshot was, that SOS lost it on the last by missing a half meter putt resulting in a win for Ed 1 up.  Still plenty of matches to play in the first round and three weeks to do it in.  In all fairness, if you and your opponent are playing on the day, you should play your match.  We don’t want to get caught up in the ‘AW, buts…’.

Noodles doesn’t like waiting around and after a bit of a traffic jam at the 18th, he wasn’t too happy about his tee shot and gave his club a flying lesson.  On one fairway, SOS managed to hit about four trees in a row – well five actually when he eventually threw his club at one of them.  Blighty lost his sand wedge but there is no evidence that it was a result of throwing it.  Reports have it that he actually played better without it.  Fortunately, it was returned in good order.  Damo put his drive on the 13th almost in the hazard on the left and then played a blind shot over the trees that finished just off the green.  The putt did a bit of hopping and bouncing which caused Damo to carry on like a pork chop until it conveniently fell into the hole for his birdie.  There should be a penalty for that!

SOS’s new addition will no longer be faced with the prospect of being known as ‘hey, you’ as she now sports the rather pretty moniker of Georgie Grace.  Well done, SOS et al.

Don’t forget about registering for the Annual Challenge in August.  $50 deposited into the Club bank account will secure you a spot.  If you are not planning to use the Golf Club accommodation in Shep, still pay the deposit and let Gordon know and he will work out what you owe depending on what you (and any significant others) do get up to.  The Club bank account details are on the website under the contacts menu.

Results for Saturday, 11 March 2017
1st Damien Lee(44) 2nd Ryan Porker(40) 2nd Chris Priems(40) 3rd Brendon Mitchell(38) 4th Jason Hopkins(37) 4th Dennis Tiernan(37) 5th Ed Kloprogge(35)

Seniors Results: 1st Dennis Tiernan (37) 2nd Ed Kloprogge (35) 3rd Craig Cameron (34) 3rd Rod Grant (34) 3rd Targe Mifsud (34)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin No 1 12th Jackpot ProPin No 2 18th Craig Cameron BallPin 4th Ryan Porker

Little did the field of 21 players who set out this morning realise that they were about to be participants in an historic event.  Well, 20 lasted out to witness the finish.  Noodles, who started out in the first group because he had to get away but who then relegated himself to the third group, just had to rush off after the 13th to make it to his appointment.  It was supposed to be work and not another dinner date.  If you want a cheap night out, just take Noodles to a vegetarian restaurant.  It must have been an important date as he sat through the night drinking water and didn’t even find an excuse to nick out for a burger.

Enough of Noodles social life (or lack thereof) and onto the really important news.  SOS is a dad again.  The stork flew in on schedule on Thursday and delivered a little sister for Olivia who hasn’t decided on a name just yet so for the time being all SOS’s so-called friends are suggesting that Black and Gold would be a good starting point.  While on the topic of Olivia, she was with SOS for the AGM and was given one of the kid’s putters from the pro-shop and a ball to amuse herself while the meeting was in progress.  Not sure whether it was spontaneous or not but she toddled around and offered the putter to Targe, much to the amusement of the assembled masses.

But, even more importantly, the long drought is over.  After two years and four months, Mehmet has won both an event and a Monthly Medal.  Mehm started out very steadily and completed the first nine just three over the card.  At that stage, the nerves started to kick in just a little and though the weather was a little warm, Mehm began to sweat and reckons he lost about 5kg over the course of the back nine.  But there were only three bogies and one off-setting birdie to finish the nine two over the card to produce a 73 off the stick, net 63.  Despite all sorts of discussions about the possibility of being matched and beaten in a count-back or even beaten outright, nothing eventuated and Mehm was the well deserved winner.  Mehm’s card only sported the two birdies but they seem to have flowed fairly freely today as there were a total of 18 from those that completed the course.  Reports of Noodle’s standard of play suggest that he was unlikely to have contributed a great deal to the total.

Eddie was out and about during the week playing a matchplay round with some other club that he associates with.  He played well enough to win his match and it seems that the practice might have done him some good though he did have to come home with a wet sail after a not so flash front nine that started with a birdie and mostly went down-hill from there.  A pretty spectacular one under the card on the back nine was more than enough the have him secure the second place spot with a net score of 66.  Pepsi played with the two Priems boys today and the love affair with the trees seems to be well and truly alive and runs in the family as both profited from the favourable treatment from the arboreal gods.  Peps also reckons that there is no way that Rob should be playing off 14 (and he doesn’t any more) after his performance today to produce a 67 net for third spot.

As if feeling guilty for only putting one player in each of the first three places, the golf gods decided to make recompense by heaping players onto the last two spots for points.  Three seniors tied up for fourth place by playing exactly to their handicap and a net 68.  They were Craig, Bob and Targe.  Now Craig, it seems, clobbered his drive from the 13th and put it into the hazard on the left.  His shot from the drop was a little left of the line but must have come off the path and down the bank to finish about 300mm from the hole.  An easy, uphill putt made the par look remarkably easy.  Bob was reported to be very quiet today and the thinking was that he must have been going OK and while it wasn’t winning form it was still pretty respectable.  From the 10th, Targe hit his drive into the big tree on the left and the ball finished right at the base of the tree.  Even Targe admitted that the only reason that he was able to make any sort of shot was because of his stature that allowed him to back up, rather intimately, to the trunk of the tree to get a playable stance.

Michael also got a bit of a sweat up as he felt the pressure of playing in the Medal of Medallists event as well as our own high powered competition.  Despite the ‘friction’ between Chrispy and Pepsi during the round, they also managed to come in the the same score to share the podium with Michael with the net score of 70.

The BallPin today was on the 12th (though there was some suggestion that it was supposed to be on the 7th) and the person that got closest in the end was Noodles.  There was a lot of discussion as to whether he was eligible since he didn’t finish the round but, in all fairness, he did pay his money and left for a ‘good’ reason.  The ProPin was on the 15th and Dennis played a provisional ball on the basis that he wasn’t sure if his first had made the distance over the ‘rough’ on the left.  As it turned out, the first ball actually finished on the green 3.86m from the hole and so he was very pleased to put his name on the card.  Standing on the next tee, he was fairly spewing when a ball landed less than a metre from the hole and he threatened to go over and kick it away.  As it turned out, the ball was Damo’s provisional and so it didn’t count anyway.  So, in the end, Dennis collected the Double Dollars thank you very much.  And, while on the subject of Dennis, he will be going to hospital this week for some surgery that will put him out of circulation on the golf course for some time (at least six weeks).  All the very best Dennis for the coming weeks and we look forward to seeing you back on the tees after a successful recuperation.

Harry’s swing was a little off this week so perhaps there was still a bit of a niggle in the old sciatic nerve.  A sconed drive on the 3rd didn’t even  make it to the blue markers and there was a nervous moment or two about the distance still to go to the reds but they were passed comfortably.  A similar wobbly swing on the 15th seemed to result in the ball finishing in the OOB to the left of the bottom tee but the ball did make it to be just out and ‘sort of’ playable though still short of the reds.  The only other reported draughtie for the day was down to Brent on the first who finished, not only short of the reds, and the blues but the whites as well.  A ricochet off the elm tree put his ball several metres behind in the garden bed at the back of the tee box.  It seems he made up for it later in the round when he bombed one amongst the group in front, much to their consternation.

The Beast now has a LaserShot, just like Brendon’s.  He doesn’t measure to the flag, just some nearby feature that is easy to sight on.  Harry blames Bill for his over-strike on the 12th when it was revealed that the distance was measured to the bank at the back.  As if!

After the round, the remaining members gathered for the conduct of the AGM.  Chrispy ran the meeting and reaffirmed that he was standing down as President.  After some formalities of reports and so forth, a new Committee was elected and the new Club president is none other than John Quinlan who was, unfortunately, not present today to take over the reins immediately.  There were several other absences as well but we did manage to get a full complement of Committee members and a full list will be published on the website and in the minutes that will be circulated.  One proposal of note was that there be additional distribution of accumulated funds by way of an extra ProPin each week rather than the Double Dollars on Medal days.  This will be reviewed at the end of the year to assess the effects on the Club’s financial position.

The matchplay draw is done and dusted and is published on the website under the Competitions Menu.  As usual, the person on the top row of each match is responsible for organising the match and reporting the result by the deadline.  No excuses, play or forfeit.  You have up to and including the April Monthly Medal to complete the first round.  The full set of rules is under the Rules Menu on the website.

Results for Saturday, 04 March 2017
1st Mehmet Akdag(63) 2nd Ed Kloprogge(66) 3rd Robert Priems(67) 4th Craig Cameron(68) 4th Bob McDonald(68) 4th Targe Mifsud(68) 5th Michael Gourlay(70) 5th Andrew Petricola(70) 5th Chris Priems(70)

Seniors Results: 1st Ed Kloprogge (66) 2nd Bob McDonald (68) 2nd Craig Cameron (68) 2nd Targe Mifsud (68) 3rd Bill Eastoe (72)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin 15th Dennis Ward BallPin 12th Stephen Butterfield

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The sun was shining, the birds were singing and the whole world was happy – except maybe for Harry who was banned from playing due to a case of sciatica that was still under repair.  In other words, it was a beautiful day for golf and, if the scores are to be believed, some beautiful golf was played.  However, some of the stories suggest that there were still quite a few points left out there.

A couple of weeks back, it was opined that Jason was not long for keeping his 21 handicap.  And today there was little to suggest that his new handicap will be around for the long term.  When asked at the 5th, his response was that it was his worst round ever and by the 8th he was four points and four balls down having given the trees on the front nine a right royal time of it.  Following Noodles suggestion that he should duck into the pro-shop to see if they still had balls on special, Jason played like a man possessed and carded plusses on the next eight (yes – eight) holes, scrambled a bit on the last two for squares to finish with +4 for the day.  Just wait until the lessons really take effect.

But, Jason wasn’t alone.  Gordon was in a masochistic mood and, after last week’s whipping by the handicapper, put his hand up for another lashing this week.  The fact that he had to share the honour was only due to the two lonely gashes on his card.  Simon has been bewailing the fact that he can do the back nine in 36 during the week but never on Saturday.  Today, he proved that that is not the case and his sub-80 round also put him on the winners dais, also with +4.  Simon was spotted retrieving his ‘inside’ card (+7 no less) to take home as a memento of the feat.  The mid-week rounds seem to be paying off.

Now Noodles reckons that staying on the fairway is worth eight strokes.  Well, he must have stayed on the fairway today because he was right up there with the best of them but a little hiccup on the 18th for a miss robbed him of a place on the top spot, either shared or on his own.  Maybe it was an after effect of Jason’s run of plusses or his ‘miracle’ square on the 17th that got to him. Or maybe it was the bevy of dog-walkers passing on the shared path just behind.  Still a +3 ain’t bad and there is no winners penalty.  Trevor also didn’t make too many mistakes today although one of his putts did draw a disparaging comment from Bob.  Rob was in the same group and entered a very similar card, at least as far a points scoring went but that doesn’t mean they were fighting.

Dennis was another one who took the first nine holes to warm up and at the turn things were looking a bit shaky to say the least.  But, despite sporting paint under his fingernails and up his arm (there is a DIY thing going on) he did a fine job on the back and managed to come home with two on the right side of the ledger.  On the other hand, Chrispy reckoned he felt like a pro after a one client night (don’t ask how he knows what that is like or even what he meant by it) with his third placing score alongside Dennis.  He was apparently going OK despite blaming, loudly and often an ‘air pocket’ in his glove.  However, when he found a brand spanker in his bag and put that on his mitt, he didn’t score nearly as well.  Just goes to show, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

The Beast has been lurking in his lair and hasn’t featured much of late but he let it be known that he was alive and kicking today.  Though he only managed to garner 4th place today, his +1 score card included 3 birdies that helped his Eclectic along and contributed more than somewhat to the total of 15 birdies that were carded today.  No eagles though.

The first group was just three players strong and they must have had their skates on as they were finished by 1100 and a good 30 minutes in front of the second group.  Pepsi was one of the members and perhaps he had to dash off to an important meeting (race?).  Still, even if he was in a rush, he managed to play right to his handicap for a square card.  Also lining up for the last point on offer was Ryan.

All in all, it was a good day at the office for Jason as he managed to put his ball closed enough (3.2m) on the 12th to take out the cash for the ProPin.  Hopefully, he counted it as it was passed hand to hand with the advice to ‘take some and pass it on’.  Rod was a bit unhappy about ‘just’ missing his birdie on the 18th after getting his name on the ticket for the BallPin.  Unfortunately, there was no consolation prize as he was taken out by ‘lucky’ Gordon or was that Gordon ‘lucky’.

There were a couple of draughties today.  Opinions varied about the distance that Bob’s travelled from the 16th tee and the methods used to estimate that distance mostly can’t be repeated in polite company.  Whatever the actual distance or the measuring method, opinion is that any contact between club and ball must have been very minor.  Last week, the Beast put his drive from the 17th to within half a metre of the hole and he had his picture published to mark the feat.  When asked to pose for a similar picture after his drive on the 17th, Blighty refused on the basis that the ball was less than half a metre from the tee rather than from the pin.  Go figure.

Just as Noodles was preparing to drive on the 16th a person, described as having legs up to her armpits, alighted from a car in the adjacent car-park.  For some reason, Noodles swiped left and his ball went right – over onto the 14th fairway.  On the sartorial front, it seems that Bob might have been inspired by ‘The Shark’ if the rather sharp straw hat that he was sporting is any guide.  Whether this translates to better golf remains to be seen.  Brendon also caught the fashionista’s eye with the comment that he must have been up early and got dressed in the dark.  Maybe the pink was just to match his eyes although the effects of the after breakup party should have healed by this.

Now, let it be known that the Annual general meeting of the Club is scheduled for next week after the March Monthly Medal.  Reminders have been a bit thin on the ground for which an apology is due, Ryan should have been given a heads up.  Still, some are obviously aware.  All Committee positions are open for contest and Nomination Forms are available from the website under Forms.  Please get a form and have it filled in before the meeting and let the Secretary (Blighty) know of your intentions as soon as possible.  Whilst we can take nominations from the floor, it is desirable to have things in place before hand for efficient running of the meeting.

The registrations are open for the Annual Challenge weekend in August and the deposits should be paid into the Club Account as soon as possible.  The account details are in Gordons dodger and on the website.  If you are not in it, you can’t win it (the Mustard Jacket, that is).

The matchplay draw will be set after next week’s round.  The field will consist of those financial members who have not opted out and who have played at least one round in the last six months.  Seedings will be based on the average (adjusted) strokes taken in your last three rounds with the defending Champion holding first seed.  If there are fewer that 32 eligible players, first round byes will be distributed in seeding order.  If there are more than 32 eligible players, seeds above 32 will be nominated as emergencies for the first round.  The first round has to be completed before or on the date of the April Monthly Medal.

Results for Saturday, 25 February 2017
1st Gordon Hill(+4) 1st Jason Hopkins(+4) 1st Simon Powell(+4) 2nd Stephen Butterfield(+3) 2nd Trevor Jackson(+3) 2nd Robert Priems(+3) 3rd Chris Priems(+2) 3rd Dennis Ward(+2) 4th Bill Eastoe(+1) 5th Andrew Petricola(□) 5th Ryan Porker(□)

Seniors Results: 1st Gordon Hill (+4) 1st Simon Powell (+4) 2nd Trevor Jackson (+3) 3rd Dennis Ward (+2)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin 12th Jason Hopkins BallPin 18th Gordon Hill

With a bit of cloud cover overhead only 13 members were in play, it was mentioned by Chrispy that you would have to be very unlucky not to score points. As it turns out just over half the field in fact did score at least 1 point. After a few holes the scoring wasn’t so great and it was predicted that something around 34 points would go close to winning. Gordon had other ideas however and put in a consistent effort to win with 38 points for the day.

Chrispy was in fact heading for the predicted 34 points, however he came home strong after momentarily faltering and played to his handicap to find himself in second place. The beast did not have the best start with only 14 points on the front 9, however rallied in the back 9 and came home with a wet sail to place in 3rd. SOS and Targe managed to score 34 points and shared 4th place and last but not least Dennis W and Blighty rounded out the points getters with 5th place and 32 points. Blighty was also a bit inconsistent, only scoring 8 points on the front nine, but it must have been his cuppa tea half way around which sparked a revival and 24 points on the back 9 ensured the day was not lost.

Now the eagles nest had not been poached for quite some time and the nest was included 11 balls up for the taking. The Beast stepped up on the 17th and put his drive within 2 feet of the hole. With a lot on the line, Bill was getting more and more nervous as he was waiting for the others in his group to putt out. Gordon chipped his ball from the round and his ball landed adjacent to a 10c piece on the green. He thought it was Bills marker it turns out it did not belong to anyone in the group. The mystery remains where it came from. Blighty was ‘intentionally’ taking more time than usual to putt out in an attempt to build the suspense, however it was all in vain as Bill slotted the putt to score an eagle and with it 11 balls from the nest. Now Bill must have enjoyed his round so much, he shared the balls he won with his playing group. What a guy! There were only 7  birdies scored all day, one of them by Joe how claimed to have almost scored a hole in 1, but it did not drop, but it was enough for the ball hole prize.

The money was on the 12th and after just missing out the last few weeks, Simon was closest and managed to take home all of $13! His efforts were not enough for the seniors placings with Gordon, Bill and Targe placing in the top 3.

SOS was on the 14th tee and hit a spectacular shot out of bounds on the left. While looking for his ball he came across an abandoned/lost ball. After close inspection the ball seemed a bit out of the ordinary, with the name ‘Jason Hopkins’ marked in lieu of the standard titelist, callaway etc. There was some discussion about its where abouts, did it come from a mysterious manufacturer, or had Jason decided that he would make his own balls.  As it turns out, Jason’s partner had given him the balls as a gift to avoid any confusion on the course.

Reminder to all that matchplay starts in no less than 2 weeks. Please make sure you register your intentions to play so the draw can be prepared. Also deposits for this years trip away can be paid now to register your intentions. It is sure to be a good weekend. Happy birthday to Noodles this week who is celebrating another milestone (it is not 25 which is what he surely tells all the girls).

 

 

 

Results for Saturday, 18 February 2017
1st Gordon Hill(38) 2nd Chris Priems(36) 3rd Bill Eastoe(35) 4th Targe Mifsud(34) 4th Stephen O’Sullivan(34) 5th Andrew Blight(32) 5th Dennis Ward(32)

Seniors Results: 1st Gordon Hill (38) 2nd Bill Eastoe (35) 3rd Targe Mifsud (34)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin 12th Simon Powell BallPin 15th Joe Wagenecht

Eagle’s nest Results: Eagle 17th Bill Eastoe